It’s been one hell of a week.
I’ve been unable to read very many blogs. I’m missing so many of you, and appreciate the fact that you keep coming by.
I wish I could say that I have something fabulous to write about, but other than my fab giveaway courtesy of BYF: Because You’re Fabulous which you can still enter till Monday, October 17th, with products worth over $250, it’s been pretty boring around here.
The biggest news is that my first born now has a girlfriend.
I thought this day would cause me to have some sort of negative reaction.
After all, the day I married my first husband, it took us over an hour to leave the reception because his mother was crying in his arms, saying, “…sniff…sniff…You’re going to have a new mother now.”
That should have been my first clue that the guy couldn’t even open a can of soup.
Needless to say, playing the role of his mother got very old very quick, and now he has yet another
This one is smart. She sends him to work in the town where his real mother is, so biological mother gets to clean the skid marks from his gitch.
When my son told me he had a girlfriend, I opened up the lines of communication by saying, “You better get a job. Girlfriends are expensive.”
But otherwise, I was thrilled and a little jealous that he’s going to experience those first thrills of love…
…or at least get to grope a boob.
So far I’ve refrained from mentioning that I’m available for rides to the drug store for condoms.
I’ll wait till they’ve been together for another week or so.
On an entirely different note, my mother paid for a cleaning service to come to my house for two hours.
Either she did this: 1. out of love for me and the fact that I’m so busy
blogging dealing with everything in my life or 2. she is frightened of peeing my toilets, unsure as to whether or not the green slime in the bowl will come alive and take over the world.
I suspect both reasons.
Either way I’m thrilled. Having someone else stick their hand in what could be toxic residue is like having Christmas in October.
My big dilemma now is whether to do a light house cleaning before they arrive so they don’t think I’m a pig or to simply leave a key under the matt, and resurface when they’ve left so that I don’t have to listen to their frightened cries as they see the jam puddles on my kitchen floor….what? My kids dropped the jar this week, and I haven’t had time to scrub it. That shit is sticky!
Those are the high points of the week. If I can’t think of blogging material soon, I’ll be forced to post pictures of myself posing, and we all know how uncomfortable that makes me.
Oh give me a break! It’s been months since I’ve showed off! I was due!