Last week I received a comment in which the anonymous commenter said that he/she found me funny, yet every time an ‘F’ bomb exploded in my posts, he/she was so startled and disheartened, he/she couldn’t even finish reading my post.
Perhaps I was PMSing; perhaps the commenter caught me in a vulnerable frame of mind, but after rereading the comment several times, I was unable to shake off the squeezing sensation in my chest.
The feeling of shame. I felt bad. Like I had done a very bad thing by saying ‘fucken fracking fuckity fuck fuck’…
But I do respect constructive criticism, and so I stuck my thinking cap on, and gave this issue some serious thought.
I determined to try and clean up my language. Not only on my blog but also in every day life.
Wasn’t going to be easy. I love me some good cussing, but for disheartened anonymous commenter, I was going to try.
The day after the anonymous comment, my family and I went on vacation to Daytona Beach.
Day 1: No problem! I didn’t swear once!
In the ocean, playing with the kids, sun on my face. Wiiiiiii! This is fun!Really, what would I have to swear about?
Day 2: Visited Angell & Phelps Chocolate Factory .
Look at this bad boy!
As the chocolaty goodness melted in my mouth coating my taste buds, I did contemplate releasing a rip roaring, “This is fucking amazing!”
But I didn’t.
…I may have made a comment about having an orgasm, but that doesn’t count. It’s not swearing.
Day 3, 4, and 5: Hurricane Irene makes the ocean too dangerous for swimming.
Spent the days in confined area with four kids piled on my head.
Although I did not bellow the ‘F’ word, I did say, “I am in hell.”
Day 6: Complete and total breakdown!
Missed our flight because my husband assured me it would only take one hour to drive to Orlando as opposed to an hour and a half.
At this point, I did say…loudly…, “It’s all your FUCKEN fault!”…with huge, HUGE emphasis on ‘fucken.’
Even in my turmoil and frustration at having missed our flight; at the thought of the extra money we would have to spend to switch to another flight; at the extra hours my kids would now have to spend traveling, I thought of disheartened anonymous commenter.
Then I thought, “Sorry disheartened anonymous commenter. It was either swearing or throat punching.”
I think disheartened anonymous commenter would have approved of my choice.