Blog Whore?

So the title of this post basically implies what I suspect I may be.
A whore.

Not the kind of whore you think.
No, I don’t stand on the corner peddling my blog wares for money although if someone would offer me money for my blog wares, I’m pretty sure I’d take it…
…or not…
…oh, who we kidding, I totally would.

No, what I’ve noticed about myself is that I flirt.
With bloggers.

When I’m over at their sites, leaving comments, I’m all “You’re so sexy! I’m so hot for your blog!” kind of stuff.

I go over to Mark’s from Our Simple Lives to look at his pictures.
The guy is gorgeous.
I read his post, then go over to the profile page to stare at his picture.
I sit there and stare.
Then I click back onto the post and leave a comment saying, “I like you. You’re eye candy.”

I know, not exactly what most bloggers have in mind when they’re looking for constructive feedback from their post, but I can’t help myself. I am into whatever is esthetically pleasing to the eye.
You’re hot.
I’ll tell you.
You’ll either like me.
Or you’ll threaten me with a restraining order.

Barb from This and That as I Bounce Thru Life and I don’t even make our love affair a secret anymore.
We’re constantly leaving comments for each other saying we’re going to run away together.
We’re all like, “You’re my lover! Let’s go make our love nest!”

Maybe I should be a little ashamed of myself.

But I’m not.

That’s just how I roll.

And anyway, some people happen to looooove the attention I bestow upon them.
A little “You hot blogger, you!” and an instant friendship develops.
Lazarus from The LG Report has even said that if he had a harem, I would totally be part of it.
See!
A little flirty-flirty, and boom! I’m part of a harem!
Ok.
So there isn’t a harem.
But I’m just saying, that a mutual admiration society makes everyone involved feel good.

And maybe you’re sitting there wondering about my husband, Wayne.
And you’re all, “Poor Wayne! Does he know you’re all flirty-flirty with boys and girls?”

Yes.

He knows.

He’s good with it.

He knows I love him.
He did, after all, make it out alive this week.

And I’ve already told him, I would never leave him.
Ever!

I might have a brief romp with this guy…

image from here

…and maybe this one…

image from here

…and quite possibly, this one…

image from here

…but that’s it!
Nobody else!

And he’s good with that.

I make no secret of my people-watching.

The other day we were driving home together.
Hot guy with shirt off was jogging down the road.
I said, “Whoa! Hot guy with shirt off jogging down the road!”

I then said to Wayne, “You know I’d say the same thing about you if I saw you jogging down the street with your shirt off.”
He replied, “Sure.”
“No, I’m serious, I totally would.”
He replied, “Sure.”

I said, “Remember that time before we were together, and you were in your front yard planting flowers? And I went up to you and said, “I’ll plant flowers with you anytime.”"
He replied, “What you actually said was, “When you’re done here, you can come over to my house and plant my flowers.””

“I must have meant it sexually,” I said. “You know, as in “Come over to my house and you can play in my flower bed!”"

“I don’t think so. You actually showed me the flower bed and gave me the garden shovel.”

“Oh.”

“As I also remember it, you said, “When you’re done with the flowers, you can clean my windows.”"

“Oh.”

I was momentarily at a loss for words.

But then I came back with this: “Yes, but I married YOU! I wouldn’t marry Hot Guy with his Shirt Off Running Down the Road. I bet he’d leave my windows all streaky.”

The rest of the drive was done in silence.
Obviously I made my point.

Did you like this? Share it:
87 Responses to Blog Whore?
  1. Mamma has spoken
    April 9, 2011 | 10:25 pm

    Boy you sure like them young!
    Secretly, I do too except I guess it's not a secret any more…
    Oh well, I might be banded (as in wedding band) but I'm not blind.

  2. VandyJ
    April 9, 2011 | 10:25 pm

    It all comes down to who you get into bed beside at night. As long as you can handle that person, you've got it made, right?

  3. EmptyNester
    April 9, 2011 | 10:30 pm

    You are hilarious!

  4. XLMIC
    April 9, 2011 | 10:33 pm

    I notice Justin Bieber didn't make the cut…

  5. Natalie
    April 9, 2011 | 10:43 pm

    You can't have Taye Diggs…he's mine!

    This is too funny, and I guess I'm also a blog whore too ;)

  6. Rita
    April 9, 2011 | 10:45 pm

    Still giggling! :) :)

  7. Snake
    April 9, 2011 | 10:46 pm

    You gave him a shovel and showed him the garden? Then you offered him your windows? Now that's a come on like no other I've heard! LOL Ciao

  8. Raven
    April 9, 2011 | 10:47 pm

    I totally love your flirty whoreyness. I think it's awesome, and that you are awesome, and that your blog is awesome, and that all of the above totally rock! :D

  9. Raven
    April 9, 2011 | 10:48 pm

    P.S. Now I have to head over to Mark's profile. Just gotta check it out, ya know?

  10. Big a
    April 9, 2011 | 10:53 pm

    your posts actually make me laugh … not as in smile and say lol, but as in my chest actually moves and my nose blows air through it and my stomach moves up and down.

    actual laugh.

    :)

    thank you

  11. Chanel
    April 9, 2011 | 11:18 pm

    I got a flirt comment from someone once.

    It wasn't nearly as fun as your version. You should give lessons.

  12. Jojo
    April 9, 2011 | 11:19 pm

    I lead a very sheltered blogging life. Recipes, decorating tips, travel pics…but no love and lust. I guess I'm living vicariously through your blogger journeys!

  13. suz
    April 9, 2011 | 11:22 pm

    Oh yeah! HOT was the first thing I noticed about Mark, although he is a good writer too!

  14. stephanie
    April 9, 2011 | 11:32 pm

    You crack me up. I am still giggling!

  15. LOLA
    April 9, 2011 | 11:32 pm

    I told another blogger one time that I would totally sleep with him for free because his blog made me laugh. I usually charge. You keep on making me laugh and you just don't know what kind of offer you might get, blogger baby. I am definitely a slut, a whore, and whatever else you want to call me.

    Infinities of love,

    Lola

  16. myevil3yearold
    April 9, 2011 | 11:34 pm

    Gotta go checkout hot guy Mark's blog.

  17. FatAngryBlog
    April 9, 2011 | 11:44 pm

    LOL! That's hilarious!

    I'm pretty open with Hubs re: my fantasy eye-candy (my free pass list of celebs and such).

  18. Bouncin' Barb
    April 9, 2011 | 11:45 pm

    You are the best Sandra!! Seriously, Bruce is all good with you and me, he just wants to know what day of the week he gets me. Your hubs sounds like a great guy. I am another huge flirt too. Just my nature. Love you sweetie lady XXXOOO

  19. Bibliomama
    April 9, 2011 | 11:50 pm

    I'm a total blog whore (although as Darlene says to Sam in True Blood Season two, “it ain't whorin' if you do it for love” – and I totally love my blog friends). I'm pretty sure I'd sell out given half the chance too – so I guess it's good that nobody's offering. Kind of. If you're into principles and integrity and crap like that.

  20. Kristina P.
    April 9, 2011 | 11:58 pm

    Edward does have amazing, sparkly nipples.

    You need my COmment Whore button!

  21. Heather
    April 10, 2011 | 12:28 am

    1. I love it when you tell me I am hot. I always believe you no matter how frumpy I am looking at the time.
    2. There is a lot hot about a guy who can't plant flowers AND do windows!!

  22. 00dozo
    April 10, 2011 | 12:29 am

    You're such a whore.

    Dr. Dreamy is sooooo yesterday. Little Eddie is, well, “little” (you do have a teenager don't you?). Now, Taye on the otherhand …

    I know you'll never leave Wayne and, what the heck, women can look too!

    ;-)

    (P.S. In case you do ever leave Wayne, tell him I'm a die-hard “Buds” fan, He'll know.)

  23. Lizbeth
    April 10, 2011 | 12:29 am

    Well clearly I need to sex up my comments because there's just not enough flirt going on when you come over to visit.

    I expect more the next time you come over. Bwwah!

  24. Rochelle@AFamilyofLooneys
    April 10, 2011 | 1:04 am

    Lmbo!!! Girl you are one of a kind. Love your blog.

  25. Kold_Kadavr_flatliner
    April 10, 2011 | 1:05 am

    Yeah, but how good R they? Are they wham-bam-thank-you-maam, over in 10 #@!! minutes, never really caring about the love that a woman needs and desires? Conformed by what the whorish society tells'm to be? A lil' pawn on the stage of wimpy, whorizontal direction?? C'mon, doll. I'd looove to do you and your friends in Heaven for years and years – clones and everything. Not here, not now. Yet, I'll have a BIG-ol party-hardy, girl, celebrating our resurrection. You're most invited. See ya soon. Love you. God bless you.

  26. becca
    April 10, 2011 | 1:26 am

    if i wasn't already totally in love with you this post would have been my down fall.. i loved it and at our house the rules are you can look but you can't touch. i'm good with that because i so love to look at eye candy.

  27. Julianna
    April 10, 2011 | 1:29 am

    I can't BELIEVE IT!

    All this time…

    You've been seeing other blogs?!?!?

    I feel so dirty…

  28. Making It Work Mom
    April 10, 2011 | 1:47 am

    There is a hot guy blogger? Where have I been!!!!

    You know what they say: It's not a party until the (bloggy) whore shows up!

  29. Megan
    April 10, 2011 | 1:51 am

    Lol! Nothing wrong with appreciating the beautiful things in life :)

  30. Gigi
    April 10, 2011 | 2:05 am

    You – 10; Hubby – 0.

    How can he come back from that?

  31. Tracy
    April 10, 2011 | 2:17 am

    I so admire your honesty :)

  32. Nicole
    April 10, 2011 | 3:25 am

    Of course you made your point. The point is men who garden and clean windows are hot. Hot guys who jog with their shirts off are hot, but who knows. Maybe they don't do windows. Right? That's a turn-off.

    PS–You can flirt with my blog anytime. It will probably flirt back.

  33. Theres just life
    April 10, 2011 | 3:30 am

    Like my sister always says…

    I'm married…I'm not dead.

    Look and love away.

  34. Belle
    April 10, 2011 | 3:38 am

    I have to say, if I could do such a thing as romp, those three would be perfect for it.

  35. IWASNTBLOGGEDYESTERDAY
    April 10, 2011 | 3:41 am

    Bahahah, that was hilarious :)

    so are all the other comments…it's like a brothel in here :)

  36. Coffeypot
    April 10, 2011 | 3:54 am

    I know it was just an oversite or the blogger thing lost it, but I didn't see my picture. I know it will be there next time. I'll wait! I won't hold my breath, but I'll wait…for awhile.

  37. CarrieAnn
    April 10, 2011 | 3:55 am

    I'll admit that I got a little jealous that you weren't spending hours staring at MY photo on MY blog. But then I remembered that my photo is actually a cartoon that I jacked from someone else's site. Ooops. But I'm still cute.

  38. Lazarus
    April 10, 2011 | 4:19 am

    Sandra dearest,
    Thanx so much for the shout out and for not calling attention to my George Clooney-like looks, I'm sick of being treated like a piece of meat! Love your sense of humor (or humour as you Canucks say…) Your blog is a bright spot in everyone's day. Keep up the great work!

    - Lazarus

  39. Alessandra
    April 10, 2011 | 4:48 am

    # 1 is old news, #2 is too young and too pale, but # 3 seems just about right…

  40. Carri
    April 10, 2011 | 5:15 am

    When I first saw the title of this post, I thought it said, “Big Whore” and I was like, OMG! She's finally admitting it! But then, silly me… I saw it said BLOG whore. And now I just feel like an asshole.
    You hot blogger, you!

  41. A Daft Scots Lass
    April 10, 2011 | 5:16 am

    Skankadoodle!

  42. Kelley
    April 10, 2011 | 5:21 am

    You little ho. You little hot ho. You know we love it. Hey, I'd totally share your bed at BlogHer, if I could go! Waaa!!!

  43. Yvonne
    April 10, 2011 | 5:21 am

    You are insanely funny! You “Blog Whore” you! :)

  44. Amy
    April 10, 2011 | 6:12 am

    Thanks for the laugh!

  45. Jimmy
    April 10, 2011 | 6:42 am

    Ahh well now hen, you're not so much a 'whore' as a 'hoor', there is quite a subtle difference.

    Besides, there is nothing wrong with a wee bit of flattery to make a person feel good about themselves.

  46. Efka
    April 10, 2011 | 6:55 am

    well, you definitely made my day :D

  47. Sarahf
    April 10, 2011 | 8:48 am

    Sandra, you're my favourite blog whore of all time. Now I'm off to check out the hot guy you recommended. I may be some time.

  48. Peevie Juice
    April 10, 2011 | 9:33 am

    I quite possibly made one of my best friends but blog-whoring. It's completely normal. Or NOT. Who wants to be normal anyway?!

  49. Mynx
    April 10, 2011 | 9:50 am

    What? I am not hot enough to flirt with? *pout.
    lol.
    Love this post and I think lots of us are guilty of a little blog whoring at times. I know I am.

  50. lyndylou
    April 10, 2011 | 10:19 am

    lol you make me laugh. I was so needing that today, thanks :)

  51. Alittlesprite
    April 10, 2011 | 10:58 am

    mmmmm… Dr Mc Dreamy….

    Now I must go find this Hot Mark….

  52. Kat
    April 10, 2011 | 11:09 am

    I'm a total blog whore too! I love finding new bloggers to follow and I'm not afraid to show my love. What a great community! Thanks for the laugh funny lady :) (now to go check out this Mark guy)

  53. My name WAS Female, I shit you not!
    April 10, 2011 | 12:24 pm

    Another ” wet my undies ” epic! :0)

  54. B. WHITTINGTON
    April 10, 2011 | 1:55 pm

    You are a total crack up and whether you know it or not you can write hysterical humor.
    I love reading your blog.
    This one was no disappointment.
    Thanks for cheering me up today.
    Barb

  55. Rob Slaven
    April 10, 2011 | 2:07 pm

    Of course it's all narcissism. If nobody paid attention to us, would we bother? Doubtful. Everyone has a voice and everyone wants to have it heard. No harm in that. *shrug*

  56. Anita @ GoingALittleCoastal
    April 10, 2011 | 2:20 pm

    I feel so cheap and used now. I thought I was the one and only.

    Just stay away from Jason Statham and all is good.

  57. Monkey Man
    April 10, 2011 | 3:27 pm

    Flirty is fun. I am totally and complete in love with you, er, I mean, Mrs. MM. Like you said about Wayne….I married HER and I love her. But being blog flirty with you is a hoot. Love ya, kid.

  58. The Empress
    April 10, 2011 | 4:26 pm

    WAY TO TITLE A POST!!!

  59. meleah rebeccah
    April 10, 2011 | 4:59 pm

    Girl, you absolutely crack me up. And, I think YOU are totally-super-hot. And I definitely have a “girl-crush” on you – and I mean THAT in a totally-straight kind of way!

  60. Shell
    April 10, 2011 | 6:52 pm

    I love you and your blog flirtiness. :)

  61. The Cello Strings
    April 10, 2011 | 7:15 pm

    wow…you rock.

  62. Queen B
    April 10, 2011 | 7:49 pm

    haaaaaaaaahahahaha

    we might need to initiate you into the Hot Chick Bloggers' Club

  63. Nicky
    April 10, 2011 | 8:07 pm

    How could Wayne ever doubt your love when you let him plant your flowers AND do your windows?!

  64. Kristy
    April 10, 2011 | 8:16 pm

    Nothing wrong with a little fun!

  65. Impulsive Addict
    April 10, 2011 | 8:23 pm

    Whaaat? I totally feel left out with all the flirtiness going on around me. I will fix this asap.

    Taye is HOT. I want him and LL COOL J. Not together though because I'm pretty sure I couldn't handle it. I love a little chocolate every once in a while…

  66. Mrs. Tuna
    April 10, 2011 | 8:26 pm

    You little hussy, I thought I was the only one. Your last comment to me was:

    No, my week did not fare better than yours. I say we quit school and run away together to a land where panty hose doesn't exist and the men don't have a penchant for XXX literature complete with CD.

    I guess I'm a little bit of slut for you too.

  67. Lola
    April 10, 2011 | 8:27 pm

    I TOTALLY thought I was the only one. I feel so used. And dirty. Gonna go take a very hot shower now. ;)

  68. Kate
    April 10, 2011 | 8:29 pm

    This is hilarious. I'm with you. Friendly flirting is fun.

    I've more than once said that I'm a camera whore, because no matter how miserable I am in a race, I will somehow drag forth a smile. Not as big of a smile as I got looking at those yummy pictures, maybe, but a smile nonetheless.

  69. KittyCat
    April 10, 2011 | 10:51 pm

    I also agree there is nothing wrong with some flirty convos.
    No harm no foul.

    Love your blog btw!

  70. The Onion
    April 10, 2011 | 11:07 pm

    I am headed over to lurk after the hot blogger (I bet his visits triple after your post). But wanted to say…I love Wayne. He's a keeper.

    Taye Diggs does not have his dry sense of humor, I don't think.

    http://www.alotoflayers.blogspot.com

  71. Kori Donahue
    April 11, 2011 | 12:16 am

    I love this post! You are hilarious honey!!!! Loving your blog and I'm your newest follower…thanks for commenting today..hope you'll visit again! Kori xoxo

  72. Mountain Witch
    April 11, 2011 | 12:55 am

    I feel so totally left out! What about me?? You've been to my blog. You've never said I was eye candy and that you'd have a romp with me! I'd put YOU in a harem if I had one! – Do you feel like shit now for your obvious over sight?! You should! I'm off to go stalk that hot blogger friend of yours Lazurus now. Maybe he'll think I'm eye candy.. (Sniff, sniff) :p

  73. MommaKiss
    April 11, 2011 | 1:20 am

    flirt? with bloggies? no way!

    p.s. you, me & poppy? Yum.

  74. Jeff
    April 11, 2011 | 1:23 am

    I never flirt with other bloggers…cough…cough..darn nose is growing but at least I can use to help push the space bar :-)

  75. Cake Betch
    April 11, 2011 | 1:43 am

    You shameless flirty whore! Everyone LOVES a shameless flirty whore!

  76. Wombat Central
    April 11, 2011 | 11:45 am

    My husband is totally okay with my secret whorish (is that a word?) intentions with John Cena.

  77. Linda Medrano
    April 11, 2011 | 5:28 pm

    Hot Tramp, I love you so!

  78. Jenny Brown
    April 11, 2011 | 8:07 pm

    You little tramp….and to think I actually thought we had something special going on…and all this time you're flirting with everyone! Hm…

  79. Antares Cryptos
    April 11, 2011 | 10:05 pm

    You are the funniest creepy blogger I know. Actually, you're the only funny creepy blogger I know. You're *special*.

  80. Jo-Anne Rambling
    April 12, 2011 | 1:48 am

    Better a blog whore then a whore whore…………..

  81. Katie Potter
    April 12, 2011 | 3:55 pm

    Well I LOVE reading this blog AND think you're hot!

  82. Sparkling
    April 13, 2011 | 2:21 pm

    Awesome. Hot guy running with shirt off. Better be really hot to be allowed to run by me without a shirt. No giggling allowed.

  83. Andrea (ace1028)
    April 13, 2011 | 3:04 pm

    AHAHAH! Hilarious. And I love you.

    Oh, wait, that would make me a whore, too.

    Bah, nevermind. Lurks off into the corner to read more of your entertaining posts.

  84. gayle
    April 13, 2011 | 9:16 pm

    You do make the best comments!!

  85. Kathy
    April 14, 2011 | 12:14 am

    Sandra this is hysterical! I adore my husband but I'd have to concur with Patrick Dempsey and Taye Diggs, the other guy is just too young for me! I'm so excited to find you, what fun! Thanks so much for finding me!

  86. The Adorkable Ditz
    April 23, 2011 | 9:41 pm

    :P You are just a big attention whore flirt aren't you?

  87. BusyWorkingMama
    May 8, 2011 | 11:29 pm

    Hot guy pic #1 = love! Cutie. I think my hubby needs a leather jacket.

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