My charming quirks!

As the title implies, this post is all about me!
Quelle surprise!
…and my adorable habits.

You’ll see.
By the end of this post, you’ll be like, “She IS fucken cute!”

1.  Everytime I walk by the full length mirror in my bedroom, I lift my top and stare at my stomach…
…Of course you think I’m checking out my abs.
I’m not.
I have a mole that I’m freakishly obsessed with.

…But since I’m standing there anyway, I like to flex.

2.  Feces and vomit don’t bother me one bit.
I can be elbow deep in shit, no problem!
Vomit! Bring it on!
But if one of my kids shows me a lose tooth, I’m like, “Gross! Teeth guts!”

3.  Anytime my husband walks in on me when I’m naked, I will ask him, “Do you think I’m fat?”
After 9 years together, he has officially run out of clever ways to answer, “You’re not.”
He no longer answers at all.

4.  I LOVE the word ‘vagina.’
Why, you ask?
Why not!
What’s not to love!
It’s a fun word. It’s a fun body part. And it’s cute too. Totally non-threatening.

5. I cry when I get bad grades in school.

…Then I come home and make my kids do the housework.

6.  I never outgrew my naps as a baby.

6.  I don’t like talking to my husband after 7pm.

This picture was taken before 7pm.
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90 Responses to My charming quirks!
  1. Chanel
    March 18, 2011 | 1:07 am

    Teeth guts? You know, I never knew what to call that soft spot after the tooth fell out and it felt all gummy. Now I know.

    And you're right. It's pretty gross.

    Why would you ask if you're fat? You're nothing like fat.

  2. Lightning Bug's Butt
    March 18, 2011 | 1:09 am

    Always knew you were cute. This post was just confirmation.

  3. Kristina P.
    March 18, 2011 | 1:12 am

    You are adorable. Like Justin Bieber.

  4. MoniqueS
    March 18, 2011 | 1:17 am

    Yes you are pretty cute! Not sure about the vomit part. And I think vayjayjay is a fun alternative too!

  5. laughingmom
    March 18, 2011 | 1:20 am

    Only ONE full length mirror in the bedroom? That certainly isn't enough to reflect all of your cuteness!

  6. Bridget
    March 18, 2011 | 1:23 am

    LOL too funny!! I love this post!

  7. Bridget
    March 18, 2011 | 1:23 am

    LOL too funny!! I love this post!

  8. bluzdude
    March 18, 2011 | 1:33 am

    That's a picture of a guy that looks like he still wonders what he did so right, to get so lucky.

  9. knitwit
    March 18, 2011 | 1:49 am

    Ha ha ha! I cry if I get a bad grade too. That's the real reason I refuse to even consider going back to school. The next time you get a bad grade, keep this in mind. Back in the day, I flunked a test to become a McDonald's manager. Had to take it twice! It really doesn't get worse than that. I have no idea how I got a degree.

  10. VandyJ
    March 18, 2011 | 1:54 am

    I always suck in my tummy when I'm looking in the mirror while changing for bed. Not that I'm chubby, but after two kids the tummy–she ain't what she used to be. So I totally get the looking.

  11. Raven
    March 18, 2011 | 1:57 am

    Love your quirks! I have a saliva issue. I even vomit when I'm brushing my own teeth cuz the saliva gets all foamy and..I'm gonna stop there before I vomit.

    I looove the word vagina. I also like the word dildo.

  12. " Hit It......."
    March 18, 2011 | 2:03 am

    If I had your flat abs…I would be checking them out too. Teeth gross me out more than I can say. I can't even stand to watch them wiggle their teeth.

  13. Rebecca
    March 18, 2011 | 2:06 am

    I can one up you on the crying on bad grades in school. When I was in college and I had to sign up for a class that I *thought* I would get a bad grade in, I would cry my eyes out filling out the form, and turning in my registration and usually on the first few days of class. Then when the report card came and if I got anything less than an A, I would go into a pretty crazy depression for a few weeks. (For the record, I somehow managed go graduate with a 3.8 GPA)

  14. Rebecca
    March 18, 2011 | 2:08 am

    ….and the nap thing. The only reason I don't nap now is because my kids are evil spawns that don't let me sleep. Once they start napping again (teens?), I will totally start sleeping 12 hours at night and taking a 2 hour siesta daily.

  15. Lin
    March 18, 2011 | 2:12 am

    Aw…you are cute lol. Also, Im totally jealous, I wish I had nice abs to flex :(

  16. ChiTown Girl
    March 18, 2011 | 2:19 am

    I don't even want to know what you check out when you look in that mirror above your bed. Oh, wait…your vagina! DUH!

    I'm exactly the opposite with the grossness. Teeth don't bother me. Well, not as much as they used to. I can't pull a loose one out or anything, but we lose a LOT of teeth in 1st grade (3 this week alone!) so I've just gotten used to it.

    Now vomit? That's a WHOLE different story all together. I do NOT do vomit!!! The ex moved out before my son was 2, but for his entire childhood, anytime he vomited, even if it was the middle of the night, I called the ex to come deal with it because I just could NOT handle it. Just thinking about it would make me start to heave. Hell, I'm starting to heave now just typing about it!! The ex even came a couple of times because I was the one vomiting. Nice, right?

    Apparently, your husband doesn't require any dirty talk when you two are bumping uglies, huh? Well, unless you get it done before 7, that is. ;-)

  17. Rhapsody B.
    March 18, 2011 | 2:28 am

    hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm………..
    cute huh, ok I'll take your word for it. Just so you know, I pass on the shit and vomit. I thought my children from a young age to vomit in the toilet, so I outgrew the shit and vomit pretty early.

    Enjoy the rest of your week.
    Hope to see you via comment by my place.

    stay happy…
    Rhapsody

  18. Carri
    March 18, 2011 | 2:29 am

    OK, you make me feel better about liking the word cock. COCK COCK COCK COCK
    And also? If I had that bod, I'd be checking myself out too.

  19. stephanie
    March 18, 2011 | 2:30 am

    Too funny! And tooth guts is the perfect term- ick!

  20. Tipsy - tipsyreader.com
    March 18, 2011 | 2:45 am

    Did anyone grow out of taking naps? Spain has got it down, man. I'm jealous of the whole damn country!

  21. Monkey Man
    March 18, 2011 | 2:47 am

    1. I was shocked you wrote a blog about yourself.
    2. I was equally shocked that you have a gross mole.
    3. I love vagina too
    4. I wish my wife didn't talk to me after 7PM
    5. I love how I turned this into a blog about me.
    6. I love how you have two number 6's
    6. same as above.

  22. ~ Darla ~
    March 18, 2011 | 3:00 am

    You're the perfect nurse. So what do you do with your hubby after 7:00 PM?

  23. purplume
    March 18, 2011 | 3:11 am

    I don't like talking to my husband this week!

    I'm happy to read #3 and have you shoot down some comedian who says thin women never ask if they look fat.

    I love how you are uniquely you.

  24. Bouncin' Barb
    March 18, 2011 | 3:14 am

    I think you're Fucking Cute even before I read your posts. You are. You and hubby make a nice looking couple. I bet you guys laugh a lot! We do here. It's the best part of our relationship. The laughter! (Well, and the great sex too)

  25. Coffeypot
    March 18, 2011 | 3:15 am

    I can't comment…in shock…posted about yourself…I feel weak…zzzzzzz

  26. 7ladybugz
    March 18, 2011 | 3:17 am

    LOL Teeth Guts LOL I am learning all kinds of stuff today LOL
    ~HUG~

  27. The Onion
    March 18, 2011 | 3:41 am

    Teeth guts, fingernail removal and other creepiness is no, no, no for me. bad cuts, no problem. shots to a fingernail, I am out.

  28. Yvonne
    March 18, 2011 | 3:46 am

    I've never heard the term “teeth guts” before! Ha! How fitting! I'm channeling my inner “Sandra” in hopes of obtaining your long legs! Nope, not working, still got the tree stumps!!! Damn you!!! lol

  29. From Tracie
    March 18, 2011 | 3:54 am

    “Teeth Guts” ewwww I never realized before how gross that was….but now that I think about it, the name fits.

    I love the word vagina too! It is a great word….why people are so intimidated by that word, I will never understand. But no cutesy euphanisms for me.

  30. dddiva
    March 18, 2011 | 4:17 am

    I had to learn to deal with gross stuff (and I still suck at it) but really, feet gross me out probably more than anything, and everyone says I have cute feet. *rolls eyes*

    hahaha running out of ways to say you don't look fat- I love asking that- well when I am feeling fat I don't but mostly I love asking but I'm a major dork like that.

    You are adorable!

  31. Jill
    March 18, 2011 | 4:22 am

    I always thought you were fuckin' cute but now even more so.

  32. Saimi
    March 18, 2011 | 4:32 am

    Awe now see that's where we're different, I love to pull teeth, only if my kids would have let me. The would see me coming and take off in the other direction. I've even attempted it while they were sleeping..

  33. Bossy Betty
    March 18, 2011 | 4:42 am

    Fascinating! Utterly fascinating!

  34. Samantha
    March 18, 2011 | 4:45 am

    It's all about the snatch :)

    I refuse to talk to anyone before 7am. It's a mess of grunts, hisses, and low, threatening growls.

  35. Pearl
    March 18, 2011 | 4:50 am

    it's a good thing i subscribed to your blog sandra. i'm updated now:-) don't wanna miss anything you'll tell.

  36. Laoch of Chicago
    March 18, 2011 | 5:04 am

    Napping is glorious.

  37. SherilinR
    March 18, 2011 | 5:55 am

    i like loose teeth so much that i even pulled out my baby cat's loose tooth. and saved it in a box with my daughter's old teeth. we're not weird or anything.
    and i like the word vagina too. but even more when it's surrounded by the words “spicy” and “bubble”. because nothing's funnier or more descriptive than a spicy vagina bubble.

  38. Sarah
    March 18, 2011 | 5:56 am

    I have been thinking what to call the lady bits, for when my daughter is a bit older…and decided to call everything what it is. That way she is ahead of the rest of her classmates when they do anatomy ;) nothing wrong with vagina!

    Naps…I love them! I need them! My daughter is being horribly evil. She waits until I think she is napping and I start drifting off to get up and run around! Dammit kid! Take a fucken nap while the baby is! Mama would be so much happier :)

    So what do you do after 7? I don't like to talk before 7…no 8…make that 9 am! In fact, I'm pretty sure I am not capable of talk; just grunts and groans!

  39. Jessica
    March 18, 2011 | 6:03 am

    I don't like to talk to my husband (or anyone else) before 9am. Very suprising that puke and poop don't bother you but teeth guts do.

  40. Holly
    March 18, 2011 | 8:57 am

    Just don't name a child “vagina” LOL!!

    Teeth guts.. FUNNY!!

    I'm sure he's OK not using the English language after 7 as long as body language is sometimes still available!! BAHAHA!!!

    Yes, you are adorably cute. ;p

  41. becca
    March 18, 2011 | 10:12 am

    you're youare absolutely to cute :)

  42. Justsayin'
    March 18, 2011 | 10:23 am

    :) Great post. The teeth guts…that's too funny.

  43. A Daft Scots Lass
    March 18, 2011 | 11:29 am

    why what happens after 7pm

  44. Cathy Webster (Olliffe)
    March 18, 2011 | 11:34 am

    Funny word, vagina… I was watching Canada AM this morning and Jeff was reading the weather and he came to Regina and, even though I've heard this a MILLION ZILLION times I still think “Regina Vagina” and wonder if people who live there want to change the name and laugh uproariously.
    It never gets old….

  45. Deborah
    March 18, 2011 | 11:53 am

    I do the same thing when I walk by a mirror except I'm sucking it in so I don't think I'm such a fatty.

    My wasband used to HATE it when I used the word vagina with our daughters. “Can't you say something else???” Hence the was in wasband. Or at least one reason. Ha . . .

  46. Lemons Don't Make Lemonade
    March 18, 2011 | 12:03 pm

    I wish I had abs.

    :O

    Do you still work out a lot?

    SEXAYYYE.

  47. myevil3yearold
    March 18, 2011 | 12:04 pm

    Teeth guts…. are very icky. My oldest has a loose tooth and he sneaks up on me and when I turn around he is right there wiggling it. He knows I think it is gross!

  48. Crystal
    March 18, 2011 | 1:35 pm

    LOL!! I think teeth guts are gross too.And my kids always think I need to see it. Yuck!! Hubby and I don't talk much after 8pm….we're too busy getting ready for bed!!

  49. Raquel's World
    March 18, 2011 | 1:46 pm

    Ha NO ONE can talk to me after 730p. No kids, no man, no phone calls. Occasionally I will respond to a text. The best part is everyone knows this so no one even trys.

  50. Cake Betch
    March 18, 2011 | 2:38 pm

    I'm confused, did I miss something? Why don't you like talking to your husband after 7pm?

  51. Brandy@YDK
    March 18, 2011 | 2:38 pm

    I don't like to talk to my husband ever.

  52. Fizzgig
    March 18, 2011 | 2:57 pm

    i love nothing more than a good nap!

  53. Laurie of Lulu and Daisy
    March 18, 2011 | 3:36 pm

    Teeth guts made me laugh out loud. I wish I could take a daily nap….it's against office policy to sleep in my cube.

  54. Donna @ The House on the Corner
    March 18, 2011 | 4:18 pm

    Fat?!?!?

    You? Fat??

    I'll show you fat!

    Hop on over to my blog ~ click on any post with my picture on it…

    That's fat!

    And that's only the fat that I'm allowed to post on a “family friendly” blog….

    I have more!

  55. twelvedaysold
    March 18, 2011 | 4:55 pm

    My favorite word is hoist. It's not a body part, so I don't know why I'm telling you this. But there it is.

  56. CkretsGalore
    March 18, 2011 | 5:07 pm

    Now why don't you like talking to your hubby after 7pm? Just curious…

  57. randine
    March 18, 2011 | 5:17 pm

    Loose teeth totally freak me out, too. My kids ask me to feel how loose their teeth are, and I pucker up my face, close my eyes, feel it and then promptly withdraw my hand, screaming “Oh my God! It's moving! I felt it move!”
    Maybe it's a nurse thing.

  58. pattypunker
    March 18, 2011 | 5:29 pm

    i don't talk to my husband before 7 am. he has waaaay too much energy in the morning. i do talk to him after 7 pm though cuz that's when i hit the franzia tap.

  59. XLMIC
    March 18, 2011 | 5:46 pm

    Poop, vomit, tooth guts, blood… bring it ALL on! But… pus-blistered, infected fingernails… YIKES! Actually, I think it is just PUS in general that skeeves me.

  60. Julianna
    March 18, 2011 | 6:17 pm

    Teeth guts… yeah gross.

    And Almost And I just swing the other way on the fat thing…

    Me: “What are you thinking for dinner?”
    Him: “Are you calling me fat?”

    Him: “It's a really nice day out, let's take the kids for a walk to get ice cream”
    Me: “Why do we have to walk? are you calling me fat?”

    Me: “Really? The hamper's 2 feet away, you couldn't have put your clothes in it?”
    Him “I think you're calling me fat AND lazy.”

    Him: “Guess what I did?”
    Me: “a sit up?”

    Okay, maybe the last one I was calling him fat…

    (giggles) Posted on the wedding updates… didn't want you to miss it. :)

  61. Lola
    March 18, 2011 | 6:20 pm

    It goes without saying that your quirks are beyond precious. But I'm jealous…and having a difficult time getting past the fact that you get like a BAJILLION comments to “I like to flex”. Although perhaps it's more in response to the part about your cute vagina. That sounds about right.

  62. meleah rebeccah
    March 18, 2011 | 6:20 pm

    Yes, yes you are VERY fucken cute!!! And I never outgrew naps either!

  63. Linda Medrano
    March 18, 2011 | 6:37 pm

    You are hysterical. Plus cute.

  64. Jenny Brown
    March 18, 2011 | 6:48 pm

    HA! You're right….you're so 'freakin' cute….I love your list, by the way! :) :) You never cease to make me giggle! :) :) (smiles)

  65. PBJdreamer
    March 18, 2011 | 7:08 pm

    love your posts

    I too, go into “leave me alone it is after 8pm” mode. My kids even know better than to call.

    heeee

    that is all

  66. Nari
    March 18, 2011 | 7:26 pm

    You're right. You really ARE cute. The way you feel about loose teeth is the way I feel about anything having to do with eyeballs. I don't gross out easily but my family knows they can easily coerce me into anything by folding their eyelid up or threatening to touch their eyeball. * shivers*

  67. Ms.Wasteland
    March 18, 2011 | 7:53 pm

    My husband doesn't talk to me. Ever. So I don't have to put any special time restrictions on him.

  68. Dutch Sugar Babe
    March 18, 2011 | 8:06 pm

    Tee hee.. Yup, too f cking cute!

    Vomit… ewwwwwww..
    Um, some vagina's really are not cute at all. Or so I have been told.

    Have a nice weekend!

  69. granny1947
    March 18, 2011 | 10:37 pm

    You are such an idiot…just love your posts.

  70. Holly Ruggiero
    March 18, 2011 | 11:34 pm

    Really 7PM. Interesting. I think you need to dedicate a post about that. It's totally fascinating.

  71. Anita
    March 18, 2011 | 11:44 pm

    Inside your womanly self, your cute little girl self still lives. :)

    Great pic!

    EnJoy your weekend!

  72. Debbie
    March 19, 2011 | 12:05 am

    You are beyond funny!

  73. Making It Work Mom
    March 19, 2011 | 2:26 am

    I don't mind teeth, or vomit, or poop. I don't like feet. At all.

    I don't want to talk to my husband after 8pm. Really I just prefer he goes to bed and leaves me alone.

  74. Lazarus
    March 19, 2011 | 3:36 am

    Sandra, we read your blog to hear about all of your narcissism so don't apologize, it's what entertains us!

  75. Bless My Bitchy Heart
    March 19, 2011 | 5:04 am

    OH my gosh, like everyone else, I LOVE “teeth guts”! You HAVE to copyright that or something! Too Funny! Or start a band-that would be an AWESOME name!

  76. Flying high in the sky....
    March 19, 2011 | 8:16 am

    How cute!!! loved coming back to your site!! what a relief to read your post…always manages to freshen me up!

  77. Mrs. Tuna
    March 19, 2011 | 1:21 pm

    Pffft, why bother with this post, we all knew you were the cutest.

  78. Snake
    March 19, 2011 | 3:37 pm

    That's OK, cause he's probably watching hockey after 7 pm anyway, right?! Ciao baby

  79. The Chicken's Consigliere
    March 19, 2011 | 6:16 pm

    I'm thinking there are probably more than six cute, quirky things about you. You're going to need to write a part deux

  80. Margaret (Nanny Goats)
    March 19, 2011 | 9:45 pm

    What happens after 7pm that you don't like to talk to your husband? What about your vagina? Does your vagina like to talk to him after 7pm?

  81. Kimberly
    March 19, 2011 | 11:41 pm

    Know what?
    Vagina.
    There's only one thing I have to say about that…
    Vagina.
    I also look at myself in the nitro and then I vomit a bit in my mouth because my stomach is everywhere where it shouldn't be and that makes me sad.
    Oh and…
    Vagina.

  82. Stephanie
    March 20, 2011 | 12:24 am

    This post made me laugh out loud. Yep, pretty cute.

  83. IWASNTBLOGGEDYESTERDAY
    March 20, 2011 | 2:16 am

    What the ???Nari telepathically stole my comment hahaha…eyeballs *shudder*
    I think I'll just follow you around and write Ditto :)
    Now I forgot what else I was going to say…………….oh…yes.. mirrors…I cover them :P

  84. Debbie(single;complicated)
    March 20, 2011 | 2:51 am

    ha ha ha ha ha…love this post!

  85. ellen abbott
    March 22, 2011 | 12:29 am

    that thing about your husband? Me too! By 7 PM he's had enough to drink to think that everything he says is totally funny…except that it's totally not.

  86. Stephanie
    March 22, 2011 | 3:03 am

    We can trade. I can yank teeth out like a crazy person. Vomit. No. Shit. NO NO NO.

    I prefer to do all my talking to Ryan AFTER 7 pm. ;)

  87. thoughtsappear
    March 22, 2011 | 1:34 pm

    This is my first visit to your blog, and I'm loving it. Your labels are just as entertaining as your writing!

  88. Ginger
    March 22, 2011 | 8:55 pm

    You dont talk to your husband after 7pm? Ok, really you need to write a relationship book. Cos you are defying societal norms you know :) .

    And I am beginning to like the word vagina too thanks to you!

  89. Danielle
    March 23, 2011 | 1:50 am

    Yep, you are fucking cute! I check out my stomach whenever I am at a mirror too. Then I get pissed at the world! LOL

  90. Kato
    March 23, 2011 | 5:26 pm

    OMG! I TOTALLY hear you on number one. I do that ALL the time.

    Only I AM looking at my abs….wondering where they went.

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