Alright folks, before I get into it, just wanted you to know that this week I was featured over at The LG Report where the very charming and funny Lazarus interviewed me, and I quite gladly spilled my narcissistic guts.
To entice you further, he posted a few pictures of me scantily clad.
So if you’re in the mood to further roll your eyes at me and my self-absorption, go on over and take a gander.
Do keep in mind, that in the pictures in question, I’m very hungry and hadn’t seen a Snickers bar in 8 months.
So really, I should be getting your sympathy.
In fact, I expect no less.
Now without further ado, the reason for this post.
Remember that for Valentines Day I had wanted a Pandora bracelet…
image from here
Have you read that post? You should. It got lots of page views.
Turns out though, my husband ended up feeling a little guilty.
So last night (2 days after Valentines Day!) he returns from an outing with the kids.
Again, the fucker had been gone for quite some time.
He never goes out on week nights.
So for sure I’m getting the damn bracelet, right?
He would not make the same mistake twice in one week.
My kids come into the house.
Everyone is sneaking around.
Tiptoeing up the stairs.
Finally, I get called up to our bedroom to see this…
…on the mother fucken bed.
This is my Valentines Day present.
Clearly not a Pandora bracelet.
Not even a gift card.
A giant ass teddy bear from Walmart, no less, that will…what?
What the fuck am I supposed to do with the creature?
I can tell you one thing.
The fucken thing will be taking Wayne’s spot in bed until that bracelet is produced.
Notice that the bear is sitting in the backseat of a vehicle?
That’s Wayne’s car.
After he saw my jaw hit the floor, he promptly stuffed it back into its bag with the receipt.
I found it in the backseat this morning, and thought, “Oh no you don’t! Not before I blog about this.”