If I had to use one word to describe myself, it would be this: boot-wearing.
…ok, so that’s two words.
That’s not the point…
The point is that I’m sort of notorious around these parts (and by parts I mean my family and friends) for loving boots, no matter what the size, shape, or colour.
I am not selective.
If you are a boot, I will love you, and find any outfit that will best accentuate your qualities and minimize your flaws.
I am a boot addict.
No. That’s not descriptive enough…
I am boot hoe.
I was reading someone’s blog the other day, and her post included a picture of the cutest little black clutch and a pair of black leather riding boots.
My comment went something like this: “You must be a hot sexy bitch. Wanna get together? Then I could borrow your boots.”
See? Boot hoe.
So this week, when I told Wayne, my husband, that I wanted boots for Christmas, the entire family said in unison: “Boots? No kidding!”
These are the ones I’ve selected for this year: the Classic Cardy Ugg in grey.
image from http://www.uggs-onsale-outlet.org/Uggs-Classic-Cardy.html
The thing is though, I already own many pairs of boots.
Many. Many. Many.
Cue the blog fashion show of me wearing all of the boots I own…this is a blog on narcissism people, you don’t actually think I’ll pass up the opportunity to display
myself my boots, do you?
Now before I begin, you should know that my family has a grand ol’ time mocking me as I prance and pose, so no need to comment on this.
As my friend Monkey Man enjoys pointing out to me, I’m a pimpin’
I am shameless.
…so that having been said, let the parade begin.
First on the platform, my very favourites, my Ugg boots.
To many, these are ugly and should never be worn outside of the sheep herding pasture they were originally intended for.
Me, I LOVE them all! Ugg will never make a boot I won’t love and/or proudly wear and no, Ugg is not sponsoring this post, as much as I WISH they would…hey Ugg people, send free samples, I’m a size 8!
Of course I own dressier boots, like the black riding boot, and this next one, which is similar to a riding boot, only it was better because the sole is non-skid so when I wore them at the bar, I wouldn’t slip all over the place when I was dancing
on the tables.
At about this point of the fashion show, my husband said, “Nobody cares about your boots. You’ll get more hits if you show some boob.”
I didn’t reply because I was running upstairs for a wardrobe change.
I bought these next boots in the children’s department.
I couldn’t resist.
I knew nobody else would own a pair like them.
When you see them, you’ll probably say, “Yeah. I can see why.”
But I love them, and furthermore I paid them $5.00…again, you’ll probably say, “Yeah, I can see why.”
See. They aren’t so bad.
Kind of like moon boots. Only for earth.