Why not take pictures of my boots?

If I had to use one word to describe myself, it would be this: boot-wearing.
…ok, so that’s two words.
That’s not the point…
The point is that I’m sort of notorious around these parts (and by parts I mean my family and friends) for loving boots, no matter what the size, shape, or colour.
I am not selective.
If you are a boot, I will love you, and find any outfit that will best accentuate your qualities and minimize your flaws.

I am a boot addict.
No. That’s not descriptive enough…
I am boot hoe.

I was reading someone’s blog the other day, and her post included a picture of the cutest little black clutch and a pair of black leather riding boots.
My comment went something like this: “You must be a hot sexy bitch. Wanna get together? Then I could borrow your boots.”
See? Boot hoe.

So this week, when I told Wayne, my husband, that I wanted boots for Christmas, the entire family said in unison: “Boots? No kidding!”
Shut up.

These are the ones I’ve selected for this year: the Classic Cardy Ugg in grey.

image from http://www.uggs-onsale-outlet.org/Uggs-Classic-Cardy.html

The thing is though, I already own many pairs of boots.
Many. Many. Many.

Cue the blog fashion show of me wearing all of the boots I own…this is a blog on narcissism people, you don’t actually think I’ll pass up the opportunity to display myself my boots, do you?

Now before I begin, you should know that my family has a grand ol’ time mocking me as I prance and pose, so no need to comment on this.
I know.
As my friend Monkey Man enjoys pointing out to me, I’m a pimpin’
bee-otch.
I am shameless.
…so that having been said, let the parade begin.

First on the platform, my very favourites, my Ugg boots.
To many, these are ugly and should never be worn outside of the sheep herding pasture they were originally intended for.
Me, I LOVE them all! Ugg will never make a boot I won’t love and/or proudly wear and no, Ugg is not sponsoring this post, as much as I WISH they would…hey Ugg people, send free samples, I’m a size 8!

Next up, my Sketchers.
Very simple. Cute. And comfy.
They aren’t my favourite, but I bought them when I couldn’t afford the Classic Ugg Cardy.

Of course I own dressier boots, like the black riding boot, and this next one, which is similar to a riding boot, only it was better because the sole is non-skid so when I wore them at the bar, I wouldn’t slip all over the place when I was dancing on the tables

No full body shot for this one. My son and I were arguing about my best side, and so my face is blurry.
This next boot is not for everyone, but it’s a close second to the Uggs.
Worn with shorts, a skirt, or my yoga pants, it sends the message: “I’m going to be one of these ladies who will continue to dress inappropriately for my age even while others are laughing and talking about me as I walk by with my cane.”

At about this point of the fashion show, my husband said, “Nobody cares about your boots. You’ll get more hits if you show some boob.”
I didn’t reply because I was running upstairs for a wardrobe change.

I bought these next boots in the children’s department.
I couldn’t resist.
I knew nobody else would own a pair like them.
When you see them, you’ll probably say, “Yeah. I can see why.”
But I love them, and furthermore I paid them $5.00…again, you’ll probably say, “Yeah, I can see why.”
…whatever…

See. They aren’t so bad.
Kind of like moon boots. Only for earth.

And you’re probably wondering where the boots are in this picture.
I got tired of modelling my boots, so I decided to put on the outfit that I bought the other day to wear to my faculty’s Christmas party.
Upon seeing this outfit, my daughter told me I looked like Sandy when she got all slutty for Danny in the last part of the movie Grease.
Notice, however, the great shoes. Are those not fantastic shoes?
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84 Responses to Why not take pictures of my boots?
  1. The Zany Housewife
    December 4, 2010 | 2:43 am

    Bitchin' boots. I own…um none. Sad but true. In fact, I only own a few pairs of shoes period. Now handbags…that's another story.

    Hey left you an award on my blog. No strings. Cross my heart, kiss my elbow.

  2. bonnie 'Marilyn' parker
    December 4, 2010 | 2:45 am

    i am so jealous of your collection. ive been trying to get into shoes and pretty girl boots after wearing combat boots for 4 years hahaa
    the thing is, i work in a stupid building with stupid rocks and gravel surrounding it, so they keep getting f'ed up.

    im not a huge fan of uggs (im short, they look like shit on me) but i'm loving all of those. even the 5 dollar kiddie ones ;)

    oh and i should note here
    i would kill cute things for your body. ive never had kids and ive definitely never had a tummy that flat. fml haha

  3. Charlene
    December 4, 2010 | 2:45 am

    Those boots look fabulous on you.

    I own 1 pair of boots. They cover my feet and ankles. I've not had to wear them for 6 years now as when it snows in Louisville, I stay home.

  4. PM Taylor
    December 4, 2010 | 2:51 am

    Uhm, no offense to the hubby but – EVERYBODY cares about boots. Everybody who is anybody, that is. Personally LOVE the Ugg cardis … I may or may not have them in two colors … ;-)

    PMT
    http://thisthattheotherone.blogspot.com

  5. Lightning Bug's Butt
    December 4, 2010 | 2:59 am

    The Uggs are sweet-ass! Dig those flannel ones, too.

  6. Bridget
    December 4, 2010 | 3:01 am

    I love UGGS! I have the Bailey Button in gray, but I want more…
    Your husband, being a guy, just doesn't understand how important shoes are ;)

    You are so going to be rockin' the faculty Christmas party!

  7. Mumstrosity
    December 4, 2010 | 3:01 am

    I ♥ boots and shoes. UGG is awesome but EMU is pretty good too. I'd def wear those tartan boots too.

  8. becca
    December 4, 2010 | 3:05 am

    cute boots

  9. Leah
    December 4, 2010 | 3:16 am

    You are probably not going to like me as I own exactly three pairs of boots. Two of which are kind of uncomfortable so I don't wear them out much. I am getting some fancy UGGS for Christmas that I'm very excited about wearing! So, there's hope for me! : )
    Love all YOUR boots!

  10. Mrs. Tuna
    December 4, 2010 | 3:29 am

    The only actual boots I own are actual horse riding boots for showing my actual horse. Sadly, he is on 6 months of stall rest so I only pat them and him on a weekly basis.

    But the Big Tuna likes all that leather and whips, sorry, no filter.

  11. Belle
    December 4, 2010 | 3:30 am

    I love the boots you want for Christmas – the boots you own are great too. But what I covet the most is your body. I want one just like it!

  12. -stephanie-
    December 4, 2010 | 3:30 am

    More boots, no boobs! Love your boots. And your thighs, and your tight abs. Um yeah…let's call it jealousy.

    Nice Christmas gift selection.

  13. SherilinR
    December 4, 2010 | 3:38 am

    your daughter's right, you're totally going to look like slutty sandy in that outfit, but you're right too cuz those shoes rock!
    i just bought the first pair of boots that i've owned in the 15 years since i moved away from ny to a warm place where i no longer need them.

  14. StephanieC @ Seriously?? Really? Seriously?
    December 4, 2010 | 3:47 am

    Okay, seriously, you are one hot bitch.

    Now, for the Uggs, I was given a pair by my sister and figure I will don them sometime soon.

    I love love love boots (typically high-heeled) then bitch about how much they hurt my feet and blister.

    BF is SOOOO not into the pants tucked into boots thing, so I haven't really done that because he thinks it is ridiculous.

    I say it's damn practical! Saves pant-dirtying and/or fraying. And better for sheep herding!

    You are one sexy chick. I can't imagine wearing that to my work xmas party (then again, I work with engineering and construction dudes).

  15. Yvonne
    December 4, 2010 | 3:49 am

    I love your boots but I really, really, REALLY loved your shoes!!! Very hot!!!!

  16. Blissed-Out Grandma
    December 4, 2010 | 4:03 am

    I love my pink cardy Uggs. Bought them last January and immediately blogged about them: http://blissedoutgrandma.blogspot.com/2010/01/i-heart-my-pink-uggs.html

    My only other boots are strictly for warmth.

  17. Portia
    December 4, 2010 | 4:18 am

    I live in Florida so I don't own many pairs of boots. Umm, I have my really nice cowboy boots though. Oh and a collection of flip flops.

  18. Kristina P.
    December 4, 2010 | 4:37 am

    First, I totally thought this post said “boobs” in the title, so I was a little disappointed. I do have a lot of boots. Mine are much more hooker like than yours. I need more comfy flat ones.

  19. allison
    December 4, 2010 | 4:48 am

    I totally heart boots, originally because I have weird feet and almost every shoe ever made gives me blisters. I only own slipper-like boots (wal-mart rip-offs, not uggs) and riding boots (which make me feel hot even though I'm not), but best of all, your post and some of the comments remind me of my wedding, where I was wearing a traditional wedding dress with black Doc Martens, and at one point my sister said “Allison, can you flash your boots, this gentleman wants a picture” and I hiked up my skirt and stuck out my foot and my husband's cousin said “oh thank God, I thought she said boobs”. Thanks for bringing that back.

  20. Carri
    December 4, 2010 | 4:53 am

    I love Uggs sofa king much. SO MUCH. I mean, not as much as flip flops, but still.

  21. JennyJenJen
    December 4, 2010 | 5:06 am

    Oh my you are SLAYING me with the red plaid jacket and matching boots! So fuckin cuute!

  22. BeMistified
    December 4, 2010 | 5:16 am

    Woot sexy mama Ow!

    I too ♥ my boots. One of my earlier posts was about them. Link below if you cared. haha!

    I ♥ Boots

    Boots + You = Awesomeness. Keep going with your bad self :D

  23. anSeL
    December 4, 2010 | 5:32 am

    oh my, sandra! is that a leather leggings/pants? you are one gorgeous mama!

    now i'm thinking i want a NEW pair of boots!

  24. Meri
    December 4, 2010 | 6:15 am

    I'm with you- i looooove me my boots. and I loooove me some skechers too! rock on lady!

    Meri

  25. Gina
    December 4, 2010 | 8:11 am

    Have you seen the 2005 movie “Kinky Boots” ?

    it's based on a true story in the town of Northampton UK where I lived before I emigrated Down Under. You would love it.

    The factory boss is trying to inspire the workers making the boots….

    Charlie Price: And remember. You are not making footwear. You are not making boots. You are making two and a half feet of irresistible, tubular sex!

  26. jojo
    December 4, 2010 | 8:26 am

    Luv the new ugg boots too! I am conservative, have my brown awesome riding boot and a kenneth cole wedge black she's so hot and my ancient blue original ugghs. I am wanting boot slippers myself, it gets chilly here, Rock those boots girl. BTW I play dress up atleast once a week! lol!

  27. Noelle
    December 4, 2010 | 8:55 am

    I think women everywhere are jealous right now.

  28. David Davidson
    December 4, 2010 | 9:38 am

    Your showing your boots off to a guy who wears only hiking boots and variations of hiking boots. :P

    The effect is lost on me.

  29. Flying high in the sky....
    December 4, 2010 | 9:47 am

    oh .. i love boots too!!!! you look hot in those pics!!! kudos!

  30. Jill
    December 4, 2010 | 1:28 pm

    Okay, could you be any cuter? Are you REALLY a mom?! I'm doubtful.

    I love boots too. What's not to love? Comfy, cozy…

    That holiday party outfit is slammin! Wayne better be going with you! Love the shoes, Sandy.

  31. Tanya (a Taste of T)
    December 4, 2010 | 2:04 pm

    Ah! I love love love boots. This is the best post ever! I want more boots now :)

  32. Gigi
    December 4, 2010 | 2:53 pm

    Speaking as one major, major shoe lover – those shoes are killer! A size 8 you say? What a coincidence – so am I! Are you willing to share?

  33. Heather
    December 4, 2010 | 2:54 pm

    Tell your husband I would rather see your boots than your boobs. No offense.
    I was just asking someone the other day if it was possible to own too many pairs of boots.
    Especially since it is currently about 78 degrees here.

    I enjoyed the fashion show and your daughter's Sandy comment.

  34. Nicole
    December 4, 2010 | 2:56 pm

    Wow, those are fantastic shoes (but I really, really love the boots). You can be my bff and swap boots with me anytime!

    And? I love it when Sandy gets all slutty at the carnival.

  35. CkretsGalore
    December 4, 2010 | 3:05 pm

    Well of course you should love boots when you long luscious legs like those girl!

    Shit..you're only a size 8? How tall are you? I'm 5'5 with size 9. Yes I have skis for feet.

    You would love my platform, stiletto, PVC, skanky hooker boots. I can only wear them to certain events and I can't be left unsupervised (seriously they really are like hooker/stripper boots).

  36. Matty
    December 4, 2010 | 3:11 pm

    At first, I thought the title of the post was about taking pictures of your boobs. Then to my dismay, I start reading and it's about boots. LOL

    But they are all the rage in high schools here. A lot of girls wear them.

    I was never into wearing boots. Sneakers for me.

  37. bluzdude
    December 4, 2010 | 3:19 pm

    Um, there were boots in the pictures? I never really noticed. Too distracted by all the hotness.

  38. Jessica
    December 4, 2010 | 3:38 pm

    Wayne was wrong! I liked seeing the boots!

  39. Julia Writer
    December 4, 2010 | 3:59 pm

    I love your boots, they all look so comfy. I miss wearing boots :( It's usually too warm where I am for anything other than flip flops.

  40. ModernMom
    December 4, 2010 | 4:38 pm

    Oh I too love boots!! I would wear my Uggs indoors if it wasn't so umm weird?

  41. 00dozo
    December 4, 2010 | 4:50 pm

    Um, hellooooooo!??! You live in fucking Winterpeg! You are supposed to have boots – the more the better so you have alternative ones when the others get soggy and get that nasty wet-dog smell.

    It doesn't snow where I now live and the only pair I have are 'Peter-Pan getaway boots'.

    Nice footwear, though. I really like those furry ones.
    ;-)

  42. Jenny
    December 4, 2010 | 5:14 pm

    Love those grey Uggs. I've been obsessing over that same pair for a while :)

  43. Fran
    December 4, 2010 | 5:42 pm

    This was great fun to read and has given me an idea but I can't compete with you. I will soon be posting pictures of myself in my various pairs of slippers. Pink and fluffy. 1983 with holes in the toes. Tartan ones from a holiday in Scotland. I am sure everyone will rush over to see this.

  44. Alex
    December 4, 2010 | 6:18 pm

    Love your boots. I'm a shoe and purse hoe..we should be friends! love your blog!

  45. Oilfield Trash
    December 4, 2010 | 6:19 pm

    Boots? You had boots on in those pictures? I didn't see them. lol

  46. Jane
    December 4, 2010 | 7:46 pm

    Love your boots. I too love boots of all kinds!

    Jane

  47. Bouncin' Barb
    December 4, 2010 | 7:52 pm

    WooHoo Woman! Sexy….love the boots and outfits. Hey I'm 50 and plus sized and I wear mini skirts and go braless. Nothing wrong with wearing what makes you feel good.

  48. Capital Mom
    December 4, 2010 | 9:45 pm

    Well, you do live in Winnipeg. Boots are mandatory.

  49. A girl needs 2 Talk
    December 4, 2010 | 10:03 pm

    You're going to make a million just out of this post! :D

  50. TheBabyMammaChronicles
    December 4, 2010 | 10:19 pm

    Haha, the $5 kids boots are actually my favorite of the group.

  51. The Adorkable Ditz
    December 4, 2010 | 11:53 pm

    I'm sorry but I have to agree with your daughter on the last outfit. You're shiny just like her in the last part. And replying to what you said in my blog, yes you can adopt me. :P

    I'm not much of a boot person but I do have my basics, brown ugg looking ones, black leather, and one brownish green that gives me that cowboy look.

    http://theadorkableditzmissteps.blogspot.com/

  52. colenic
    December 5, 2010 | 12:22 am

    I am on the lookout for boot actually….I am trying to buy into the uggs and haven't yet…
    I do however love the last pair of shoes….they make the outfit..

  53. MacDougal Street Baby
    December 5, 2010 | 12:45 am

    I'm with your daughter on this one. Of course, seeing as I idolized Sandy when she became all slutty, I send you many kudos. If only I could comfortably wear shoes like that I would EVERYDAY! Go get 'em, tiger!

  54. Julianna
    December 5, 2010 | 12:46 am

    Got to be honset here…not really into boots. Course, if I lived somewhere I could wear them for 10 months out fo the year, I probably would be too. Now purses… well I'm currently thinking about a 12 step program.

    That said, I do have a pair of ankle high brown boots that I wear with everything. :)

  55. Jessica
    December 5, 2010 | 1:14 am

    When you get sick of all your boots, send them to me. I own none. And I'm a size 8. :)

  56. Your husband is a wise man…boobs over boots any day :-)

  57. Pragmatic Spector
    December 5, 2010 | 2:39 am

    If I were a 13 year old boy, I would be saying this, “DAYUM YOU'RE ONE MOTHERFUCKING HOT MILF!” But no, instead, I'm an 18 year old girl so let me say right now that I HOPE TO FUCKING GOD AND PRAY WITH ALL MY HEART THAT I LOOK ANYWHERE NEAR AS GOOD AS YOU AFTER I PUMP OUT BABIES OUT OF MY VAGINA. I'm not being sarcastic. I sincerely wish I was because I'm jealous of you, and my mom is jealous of you, so we're all jealous of you! I do have to be honest about the boots. They're not my type, but I've always been quite the ascetic and being an ascetic person means you don't always coordinate your outfits simply because you barely have any. I currently own one pair of boots and one pair of sneakers. My last flats broke on me. haha…

  58. Jersey Diva Mom
    December 5, 2010 | 2:50 am

    was I supposed to find something wrong with the boots for $5 from the kids dept? the only thing wrong is they are a 1/2size too small for my feet : )

  59. Unknown Mami
    December 5, 2010 | 4:40 am

    What is fantastic is you and your enthusiasm.

  60. Lisa
    December 5, 2010 | 5:17 am

    That IS slutty Sandy! Love it! You know, I was way older before I figured out that Sandy had turned into a smoking whore for Danny. Not really the best message to send youngsters who were holding the tickets to see the show. Fortunately, I was too dense to get the satanic backmasking. GO SLUTTY SANDY! She's pretty.

  61. Myya
    December 5, 2010 | 5:48 am

    That last picture deserves a DAMN GIRL!
    I love boots too… I wear my 1 pair of Uggs all the freakin time! I'm a 7 in them, dang guess that means we can't trade. I want some new ones for Christmas – doubt that will happen but I am still holding out hope!

  62. Farmers Wifey
    December 5, 2010 | 6:01 am

    I've never been called a boot before but I'm kinda liking it. You are rocking those black pants. Now that I have complimented you, would you mind voting for me here to stroke my ego somewhat…I'm on page 2 under Farmers Wifey..xx

    http://www.babble.com/babble-50/mommy-bloggers/nominate-a-blogger/

  63. Rox
    December 5, 2010 | 6:33 am

    I just today bought the baddest pair of thigh high boots and I can't wait to wear them!!!!!!!!! Just the boots, forget the clothes the boots are what are going to make the outfit anyway. Hell yeah.
    I'm just going to wear them around the house, perhaps to do yard work. 5 inch heels to not deter me from pulling weeds.

  64. Mom Daughter Style
    December 5, 2010 | 8:23 am

    i love all the boots. great blog, and i love your past posts too

    i just followed your blog.

  65. Holly
    December 5, 2010 | 8:40 am

    Only a MAN would think of showing the boobs for more hits. Now WHAT kind of HITS does he want YOU getting, anyway!!! LOL!!! We'll go for the stylin' boots, thanks… And those UGGS you're wantin' are SO CUTE!!! I could go for a pair of those. Of course they couldn't go over the calf because MINE are too fat… but yours are cute and skinny. ;D

    Your comment… too funny… Yep… BOOT HOE!! ;p

  66. Jeanie
    December 5, 2010 | 3:08 pm

    I love the plaid boots, and of course all the Uggs. I love boots, but sometimes feel like I am a kid playing dress-up if they get to fancy.

  67. TheUnSoccerMom
    December 5, 2010 | 3:28 pm

    I'm lovin' the boots you bought in the children's section!! But then again, I love plaid and/or flannel… so, there ya go.

    I just started getting back into boots. So far, I just have a pair of GA boots (good for kicking up dirt and/or walking through the woods) and a pair of cute black boots that I mainly wear to work…
    I need to get started buying soon if I'm to catch up w/ you though…

  68. Kait
    December 5, 2010 | 3:49 pm

    I would marry my Ugg boots if I wasn't afraid of the ridicule. But our love is true and deep and real.

  69. Stephanie in Suburbia
    December 5, 2010 | 4:55 pm

    Um, you ARE a sext bitch and we should get together and share boots. Love them! More often than not I covet rather than buy. Any chance you're a size 8? :)

  70. Aleksandra Nearing
    December 5, 2010 | 5:02 pm

    Love love love the shoes. Love the party outfit. How do you get into those pants?!?

  71. Anita @ GoingALittleCoastal
    December 5, 2010 | 7:00 pm

    I wore boots just like the Ugg boots 25 years ago when I lived in Germany. Oh crap, I didn't like the sound of that, 25 yrs ago? Ick. Anyway, they were German, you know them, always ahead of us. I don't get to wear boots much anymore here in FL.

    I'd like to know how you got into those pants too Sandy! Was crisco involved?

  72. Krebster
    December 6, 2010 | 12:21 am

    Ok, so can I just tell you how jealous I am of you? I have the biggest calves known to man. As an adult I have NEVER owned a pair of boots. They either pinch or just straight up won't slip up my legs – which I despise BTW. Rock on the boots chica. Continue to rock on.

  73. Semi-Slacker Mom
    December 6, 2010 | 2:13 am

    You are a nut. But I love me some boots too & in GA I can wear my Uggs with skirts. What you need is some cowboy boots, baby!

  74. Sarahf
    December 6, 2010 | 2:23 am

    OK, I'm off to buy some Uggs, you've sold me on them, although my budget dictates that they will be fake ones that will fall apart before Christmas! Love the Christmas outfit, if I had legs like yours, I'd wear pants like those every day.

  75. JP
    December 6, 2010 | 12:28 pm

    I believe the correct phrase would be “boot slut” unless you're getting paid to wear the boots. You're just wearing them because you want to. ;)

    They do look good on you though… for what it's worth.

  76. Ro
    December 6, 2010 | 3:36 pm

    Two things.

    You have a badass body.. your making me look bad.

    secondly… I want to go to the party where you wear this outfit… as your bodyguard and hater blocker. Or your hubby could do that.. whatevs lol

    I just bought my first pair of Ugg-like boots this weekend. the hubby hates them. NEW FAVE SHOES!

    xoxoxo

    Ro

    PEE ESS

    Im sending all my readers your way today.. cause I have to work on faculty crap..

  77. HulaBuns
    December 6, 2010 | 8:53 pm

    That song “Apple Bottom Jeans – Boots with the fur” is totally stuck in my head now, just FYI.

    LOVE your boots! You look fabulous in all of them! Also, for the record I think the tag should be “showing boob” even though you're not. lol

  78. jules
    December 6, 2010 | 8:58 pm

    I adore all your boots! I am obsessed with shoes as well. My fav pair of yours were the black dress though. Great hair as well!

  79. cathyjoy
    December 6, 2010 | 10:09 pm

    I just got me some new Uggs.

    And some new Mia's.

    And some new Ecko's that have the lumberjack look totally goin' on.

    But I?

    Am not a boot ho.

    I am a purse and sunglasses ho.

    After all…everything has to match, right?

  80. Sparkling
    December 6, 2010 | 11:29 pm

    I didn't know you like Uggs. I might have to take you off my list. There is a reason they are called Uggs. And those sweater Uggs? Come on, give me a break. Sweaters on your ankles????? When will the madness end? Try teaching nasty preteens who live in those damned boots and they STINK to high heavens.

  81. Hutch
    December 7, 2010 | 12:25 am

    My boot problem may rival your boot problem. I just got two new pair over Thanksgiving (in the US not Canada) one is a brown riding boot and the other a gray riding boot because I couldn't decide.

    Those late pair of shoes are killer!

  82. Ginger
    December 7, 2010 | 7:22 pm

    Finding it hard to believe you are Mom to teenagers…you rock those boots!!

  83. Mighty M
    December 7, 2010 | 7:58 pm

    I only own a few pairs of boots, but one of them is the UGG classic cardy (in black). Wearing them now…love them! :)

  84. Dina
    December 8, 2010 | 2:26 pm

    love all those freakin boots. I wish I had a picture but this year I got a pair of hot deep red boots, my husband balked about what I paid for them. I told him, they were wll worth it I get compliments everywhere. Even the salvation army santa in front of Bass Pro Shops made a comment. I said “see I told you so”.

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