2010 Year in Review…sort of…

I don’t often participate in these Memes, usually because I have enough topics of conversation smashing around in my head, begging to be unleashed upon the defenseless blogosphere, and expanded upon in a post.

However, I’m in the mood to write tonight, and other than a very uneventful evening with the children at the movie theatre where we went to see Life as We Know It starring Kathering Hegl, who I would most definitely dry-hump if I wasn’t already married, I’m currently embroiled in mentally debating whether I should post pictures of the new outfits I bought on Boxing day or opt for provocative bikini shots which have fueled my notoriety as the biggest and best narcissist of our time.
But when I was reading Coffeypot’s questions and answers, I thought this is the sort of post that would permit me to opportunity to revisit last year, and tie 2010 up in a nice little bow.

So without further ado:

1. What did you do in 2010 that you’d never done before?

I got through the most difficult class of my life in nursing school without:

a) ever running screaming from the class…
…I did however, once quietly exit the classroom and go to my car where I cried… but not once did I run out screaming.

b) calling any of the teachers any mean names to their faces

c) becoming a meth addict and ending up homeless

2. What countries did you visit?

…that counts right?
Where else in the world do giant rats rule the land, charge exorbitant amounts of money for a big-ass piece of ham disguised as a turkey leg, and mothers are allowed to drag their screaming little girls around by their tiaras?

3. What would you like to have in 2011 that you lacked in 2010?

A ticket to Blogher Conference 2011 in San Diego, California; all expenses paid;  a deluxe room in the best hotel (please no bedbugs) complete with in-suite hottub, meals, and fouffy drinks handed to me everytime I set foot in the lobby…
…come on, the ticket itself is a fantasy, why not make the entire request a really swanky one. 

4. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

Not maiming or killing anybody while at Disneyworld.
This would include other guests, Disney characters, my children, and especially my husband…
…because not everybody wants to march their way through “It’s a Small Fucken World!” Wayne, as though the military had orders to conquer it and plant a fucken flag there.

5. What was the best thing you bought?

Bought? The best thing I bought? For myself?
People with kids buy stuff for themselves?…

6. Whose behavior merited celebration?

Wayne, my husband.
Despite the fact that I make fun of him, he lets me blog about it so he doesn’t actually read the blogs, so what, right?

7. Whose behavior made you appalled and disgusted?

The other mothers at the studio where my daughter dances: Ladies, quit living vicariously through your daugthers.
Not only is it pathetic, but then I’m forced to blog about it

8. What song will always remind you of 2010?

“Listen to the Music” by the Doobie Brothers – it’s my ring tone.
So what if I break out into a loud rendition everytime my cell phone rings?

9. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Blown my husband…
I said I wish I’d done more of it, it doesn’t mean it’s ever been done or will ever get done.
It’s just that I suspect it would make up for all the shit I write about him in here.

10. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Watched fewer episodes of  ”Toddlers in Tiaras.”
I’m pretty sure I lose IQ points every time I yell at the TV, “Anybody ever heard of Jonbennet Ramsey?”

11. Did you fall in love in 2010?

Can I count myself?…no?…how ’bout my straightening iron? Can I use that as my answer?

12. Who was the best new person you met?

The teacher with the constant highbeams who taught one of my nursing courses this semester.
Thanks to her, I think I was able to write at least three really entertaining posts.

And although I’ve only met Jen over at bootyandbrains who I adore and hope to meet again one day, I have forged deep and meaningful connections with several people in the blogger world.
I do hope to have the opportunity one day to sit, have a drink (preferably a meal with dessert), and enjoy the feeling of reconnecting with long lost friends.
Blogher 2011 here we come?
Well, perhaps not, but we can dream.

Happy New Year to all and to all a good night…wait, I think Santa said that, right?

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56 Responses to 2010 Year in Review…sort of…
  1. The Adorkable Ditz
    December 31, 2010 | 7:02 am

    Before I read what you wrote you have something waiting on my blog@


  2. The Adorkable Ditz
    December 31, 2010 | 7:08 am

    If you do go to Blogher 2011 maybe you should make a detour up north to see me? Well it's not really north but it's in that direction!

  3. Saimi
    December 31, 2010 | 7:10 am

    See, that's whats so great about you, you never leave anything to guess!

    Happy New Year!!

  4. Samantha Dugan
    December 31, 2010 | 7:29 am

    Oh I think I am stealing this idea. Fantastic list and I am now absolutely addicted….just what I need, one more fucking thing to be addicted to. Thanks. I am now off to sulk and drink far too much wine.

  5. Lightning Bug's Butt
    December 31, 2010 | 8:24 am

    Very productive year, and I'm glad to read you didn't murder anybody.

  6. Me
    December 31, 2010 | 8:58 am


  7. Kara Hoag
    December 31, 2010 | 9:48 am

    Um…drinks and making fun of people? Is that actually possible? Count me in!!!

    visions unto myself

  8. Thisisme.
    December 31, 2010 | 11:42 am

    Really liked the bit about not murdering anyone at Disney!! LOL! Have a great 2011 and continue to be just as funny as you are right now.

  9. SkippyMom
    December 31, 2010 | 11:50 am

    The more I read about Disneyland the less I want to return.

    Unless we can sit around drinking and making fun of people. Out loud.

    I have never been “bounced” by a large rat, but I be willing to risk it.

  10. Bouncin' Barb
    December 31, 2010 | 1:44 pm

    Sandra…you are friggen' funny. I'm so glad you are my friend. I can seriously laugh when I read you and it certainly brightens up some shitty days. Happy New Year luv! Are we still running away together?

  11. Dina @ 4 Lettre Words
    December 31, 2010 | 1:45 pm

    Great list and congrats on surviving the class!

    Hope it's a wonderful 2011 for you!

  12. TheUnSoccerMom
    December 31, 2010 | 2:08 pm

    So you went to Disney World and didn't kill anyone?? High marks for you my friend, high marks!!

    I think I would rather get my wisdom teeth reimplanted then surgically removed again w/out pain killers than go to Disney World.

    You must REALLY love your kids!

  13. Gigi
    December 31, 2010 | 2:15 pm

    Great re-cap! Here's hoping a kind and generous soul will give you that ticket! Happy New Year!

  14. Deborah
    December 31, 2010 | 2:32 pm

    I bet your husband's man-highbeams are on now if he does read your blog. You know, just the thought and all.

    Happy New Year bloggy-buddy. You are a treasure.

  15. Dazee Dreamer
    December 31, 2010 | 2:44 pm

    loved it. I've enjoyed your posts about the wanna-be-dance-mothers.

  16. Kimberly
    December 31, 2010 | 2:58 pm

    Jesus H Christ…does he have a middle name? Who gives a shit…you are hilarious and I am so glad to have stumbles upon your hilariousness.
    Cheers to a many nipple and BJ's in 2011 you hooker you.
    PS. The security code I had to type in to comment was chookula…it's also pretty funny and may be my first new word of the new year. Chookula betches

  17. The Vegetable Assassin
    December 31, 2010 | 2:59 pm

    Dude…Toddlers in Tiaras. Seriously, how fascinating a train wreck is that show? I can't tear myself away from it if it manages to start while I'm in the room. I'm horrified and utterly absorbed in how mothers can parade their little three year olds in make up and provocative clothing in front of other people to be judged. All that writhing and booty shaking and pouting. You haven't lived till you've seen a six year old lick her lipstained lips and wink seductively like “Come here judges and I'll blow you!” There's something just so morally wrong about all this and yet it's perfectly legal. WTF?

    I laughed at Disneyworld. That is not only a country in its own right, but another whole damn planet! :) Happy new year!

  18. JennyJenJen
    December 31, 2010 | 3:00 pm

    get off the computer and go blow your husband ;)

    Im so glad that we met this year! …Till we meet again my love.


  19. Nicole
    December 31, 2010 | 3:48 pm

    We're going to Disneyland this year and I feel certain that it will be the end of my sanity as I know it.

  20. Sparkling
    December 31, 2010 | 4:00 pm

    If you've been watching Toddlers in Tiaras then I am sure you've seen the ads for the show about ridiculous addictions people have. The one with the blowdryer made me think of you when you said you're in love with your straightening iron. Just make sure you turn it off when you go to bed so you don't get burned.

    I can't help watching Toddlers sometimes. I can't figure out why. I think I love to watch the mothers because I think I'll be able to figure out why they have their kids do it. And I like to see if the little girls are already ready to be assholes or if there is some salvageable human ness left. And really, it's because I wouldn't put it past me to do this to my own daughter and I want to know why!!!

  21. -stephanie-
    December 31, 2010 | 4:03 pm

    All I can do is laugh.

    Happy New Year.
    Hope all your Blogher dreams come true.

  22. Kristina P.
    December 31, 2010 | 4:14 pm

    You. Me. Blogher.

  23. becca
    December 31, 2010 | 4:34 pm

    definitely the best post i've read so far this morning and hope you have a happy new year

  24. CkretsGalore
    December 31, 2010 | 4:41 pm

    Happy New Year to ya chickie!

    Whenever I've lost my marbles and decide to go to Winnipeg I will have to look you up! (not in a creepy stalker way, just meet up for some vino kinda way.)

  25. TheBabyMammaChronicles
    December 31, 2010 | 4:57 pm

    Big year 20101, can't wait to see what 2011 holds for you!

  26. Kat
    December 31, 2010 | 5:06 pm

    Happy New Year, Sandra! I so agree with you about the Disney extravaganza. Surviving is the only battle worth fighting in that strange, strange land.

  27. Snake
    December 31, 2010 | 5:15 pm

    I had a high school English teacher just like your “favorite” nursing instructor . . . Not sure I learned much in that class . . . And I know exactly what you mean about losing IQ points watching certain television programs . . . They should come with an IQ warning on them!


  28. Mama Zen
    December 31, 2010 | 6:52 pm

    I am absolutely rolling on the floor laughing over your answer to number four!

  29. Queen B
    December 31, 2010 | 6:53 pm

    I love this! I'm stealing it :)

    Maybe if your husband knew that the payoff of blogging about him could be more bjs, he'd be a faithful reader!

  30. Rebecca
    December 31, 2010 | 7:05 pm

    I agree with you on the Blogher Conference 2011! I want a ticket too, but not because I'm a 'blogger'. I feel like I'm just the little cousin mom said everyone had to be nice to …………Anyway, I want the ticket so I can go and hang out with cool people and MEET all of the people I follow. They'd give me tickets for that, right? Along with tickets for airfare and swanky hotel and meal vouchers…right?

  31. dbs
    December 31, 2010 | 8:07 pm

    Keep dreaming. (I'm sure your husband will too.)

  32. Kimber Leszczuk.
    December 31, 2010 | 8:44 pm

    Great list! LOL – I am with you on #10. That show is like a train wreck – no idea why I watch. Those parents are not doing their kids any favors. When I watch it though it definitely makes me feel better about myself as a parent. LOL

  33. Semi-Slacker Mom
    December 31, 2010 | 8:54 pm

    Happy New Year, friend! Have a drink on me. or 12.

  34. Alessandra
    December 31, 2010 | 9:20 pm

    This one was really funny. I totally feel u on the Dysneyworld thing, I went to Disneyland and wanted to set a few mouse traps myself.

    That toddlers show makes me want to shoot the mothers. Can u imagine when those kids grow up?

  35. Baby Sister
    December 31, 2010 | 10:25 pm

    And now I have you to thank for “It's a Small World” being stuck in my head. So, thank you.

    Happy New Year!!

  36. Gigi
    December 31, 2010 | 11:24 pm

    Pleezzzzze go to BlogHer! I want to see you there!

  37. Julianna
    December 31, 2010 | 11:49 pm

    I too would love to go to Blogher… but alas… I am still a Blognobody. :) Maybe 2016?

  38. Mrs. Tuna
    December 31, 2010 | 11:53 pm

    I have to say I'm much more of a team Meridith then Team Izzy. Have a fab New Year, great “meeting” you in the wonderful world of blogging, looking forward to more hysterical posts from you in 2011.

  39. Cheeseboy
    January 1, 2011 | 12:16 am

    Well, technically D-World counts as like 10 countries because of the whole Epcot thing.

    Hey, just started following you on Twitter.

  40. ~ Darla ~
    January 1, 2011 | 12:47 am

    Toddlers and Tiaras…argggh. My hubby can't even stand watching the commercial. It makes him cringe. Especially the latest where a child (much too old) is sucking a soother and bad mouthing her mother. Hey, I would have killed my mother in her sleep if she had put me into those costumes and dolled me up like a hooker. Poor little kids.

    And since I'm talking up my hubby, I'm sure he would love #9.

    Burnt off a few calorie laughing at this post. I see a piece of gum in my future : )

  41. Ginger
    January 1, 2011 | 1:09 am

    Welcome to the year when all wishes come true – especially Blogher conference invites; I am rooting for you!!!

  42. gayle
    January 1, 2011 | 3:44 am

    Love your answers!! They are so funny!!

  43. Tinalicious
    January 1, 2011 | 6:37 am

    Loved this! I was so laughing when you said blown your hubby. LOL Not sure why I found that so funny, but I did. And I love the stuff you write about your hubby. I write about mine too. And he doesn't read my blog either. I may borrow these questions for my first blog post of 2011. You inspired me with your wit, as always.

  44. Flying high in the sky....
    January 1, 2011 | 8:40 am

    :) May the road rise to meet you. May the wind always be at your back. May the sun shine warm upon your face, the rains fall soft upon your fields and, until we meet again, may God hold you in the palm of his hand.

    Irish Blessing

  45. Clipped Wings
    January 1, 2011 | 9:56 am

    Perfect post to read at the beginning of a new year. Very funny and entertaining. Loved it.

  46. K
    January 1, 2011 | 8:36 pm

    Oh I did enjoy that. Well done for not maiming anyone this year. May
    I recommend Durex Pina Colada for number nine. It makes anything taste nice.

  47. Aleksandra Nearing
    January 1, 2011 | 10:34 pm

    One day I will make it to a blog conference. Maybe. If it doesn't interfere with the timing of my real job. Which they alwyay do. And unfortunately, I can't quit my day job. Sigh.

  48. Jill
    January 1, 2011 | 11:58 pm

    I bet Wayne would answer 9 the same way, right?

    Had no plans to attend BlogHer but I may just grant your wish if you promise to share a room with me and strut around in a bikini the whole time.

    Happy New Year my love.

  49. Bossy Betty
    January 2, 2011 | 12:41 am

    Hope your New Year is a good one!

  50. Linda Medrano
    January 2, 2011 | 12:51 am

    I have to make sure my husband NEVER reads your blog. I have convinced him that no married woman gives blow jobs. We all do it and say we like doing it before we get married. After the ring is on the finger, hah hah! The joke is on them.

  51. Coffeypot
    January 2, 2011 | 5:29 pm

    I think you are fibbing about the BJ on the husband. I bet your head looks like a basketball going down court in a high school basketball game.

  52. meleah rebeccah
    January 3, 2011 | 12:30 am

    Happy New Year, Sandra!

  53. StephanieC
    January 3, 2011 | 1:01 am

    I already love you, but number 9 just made it concrete and eternal.

  54. Danielle
    January 3, 2011 | 3:40 pm

    # 9 had me rolling! Cause that is how I roll too! LOL
    Happy New Years!

  55. Rox
    January 3, 2011 | 7:50 pm

    Toddlers in Tiaras makes me sick. Like a lot. sigh.

  56. Kim
    January 5, 2011 | 1:07 pm

    number 10 . . . oh, sweet, sweet yes. It's like a train wreck, yet I cannot leave the room. That one little train wreck w/ the mom of the dead eyes and the girl has the trashy accent at FOUR? AND she is a holy nightmare, yet you know it's not her fault, yet she keeps winning b/c the judges see beauty . . . and I think O M G whuck??? *shudders* Pretty sure you're right. Losing IQ points every single time!

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