Children as a means of entertainment

For all the parents out there, we know that the task of child rearing isn’t an easy one.
The challenge begins the second they are born, figuring out their quirks, their needs, their demands.
Then we move on to other challenges.

Sleep deprivation.
Diaper detail.
Feedings.
Colic.
Tantrums.
Messes.
Rigid routines.
Potty training.
Socialization.
Morals.
Lessons.
….

However, sometimes, when you least expect it, parenting becomes less work and more fun.

Halloween 2010 was one of those times for me.

My 13 year old, Jackson, yes, the little porn addict, had decided that he was going to go trick-or-treating one last time.
What to wear? What to wear?
He went from hockey player, which would have meant he would have killed all those in his path with the stench of his hockey gear, to hobo, which would have meant he would have needed to wear more clothing in order to appear homeless – seriously, the kid runs around in a t-shirt until the first snowfall.

Finally, with a little help from his mother ~cue the evil laughter~ we, and by we, of course I mean me, decided he was going to go as a smurf.
Oh happy days!

You’re probably wondering why this is so exciting to me. Why do I think dressing my kid up as a smurf is entertaining or fun?
It’s a terrific costume.
It’s original.
The chances of meeting up with other smurfs are highly unlikely.
So why did I have such a great time this Halloween?

Because when his friends showed up at the door to pick him up for trick-or-treating, these are the kinds of costumes they were wearing:

some kind of scary assassin guy with swordy thingies coming out of his backpack

This costume came from here

the ever popular Scream character

This costume came from here

a zombie

This costume came from here

And this is what Jackson looked like:

Of course I can always count on Wayne to make the moment even more entertaining.
As he walks by and sees me taking Jackson’s picture, he says, “Why did you sew on a butt nugget?”
To which Jackson replies, ”It’s not a butt nugget! It’s a tail!”
Wayne walks away mumbling, “Looks like a butt nugget to me.”

And that, my friends, is what gets me through my life.

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86 Responses to Children as a means of entertainment
  1. kimert
    November 18, 2010 | 4:24 pm

    Love it! My friend's son went as a Smurf last year. I do not recall the "Butt nugget" on him though. Nice touch! LOL

  2. Mynx
    November 18, 2010 | 4:26 pm

    Very cool. Gotta love a Smurf with teenager attitude.

  3. Donna @ The House on the Corner
    November 18, 2010 | 4:31 pm

    …wish I'd thought of that…..

  4. Big Fat Gini
    November 18, 2010 | 4:33 pm

    Love it! Our oldest ended up being a guy from the 80's after I happened upon Mr. BFG's totally rad acid wash denim jacket.

    Oh yes. It was awesome.

  5. Pragmatic Spector
    November 18, 2010 | 4:34 pm

    Your son looks absolutely PRECIOUS

  6. Nicole
    November 18, 2010 | 4:41 pm

    I can't wait to be able to enjoy my kids in this exact same way—through social torture.

  7. Kristina P.
    November 18, 2010 | 4:48 pm

    OK, I've decided that I need to immediately start having kids. If nothing else but for the purpose of mocking and humiliating them.

  8. Bird Shit and Baby Caca
    November 18, 2010 | 4:48 pm

    I love when the kids at least try to put some originality into their costumes. I usually give them more candy

  9. Kelley
    November 18, 2010 | 5:02 pm

    A blue butt nugget! Mmm!! What a cute costume. Might paint my boys blue next year. Love it!

  10. Kimberly
    November 18, 2010 | 5:09 pm

    Mom, you are a maniacal butt nugget. Save this one for the wedding video.

  11. Heather
    November 18, 2010 | 5:13 pm

    LOVE IT!! Why have kids if you can't do that to them!

    Butt nugget. Ha!

  12. Pragmatic Spector
    November 18, 2010 | 5:14 pm

    Haha well it's legal in the philippines if you're referring to my underage drinking (Where it took place) but thanks for commenting on my youth :D

  13. Portia
    November 18, 2010 | 5:18 pm

    MY son would have died! LOL so funny!

  14. Kara Hoag
    November 18, 2010 | 5:21 pm

    Oh my God. He looks adorable and angry at the same time. That is awesome.

    karahoag.blogspot.com

  15. ShannonL
    November 18, 2010 | 5:28 pm

    Too funny! Can't believe he let you do that to him! He must be a pretty good sport! Great costume! :-)

  16. Steph
    November 18, 2010 | 5:29 pm

    Poor little fella. How embarrassing! I can't wait to have kids so I can humiliate them when they are older.

  17. Bibliomama
    November 18, 2010 | 5:32 pm

    I am shielding my eyes from the blinding awesomeness. I always say the least they can do is submit to embarrassment and humiliation after everything they put us through.

  18. Ashley
    November 18, 2010 | 5:45 pm

    I almost peed my pants a little. LOL. Jackson looks SOOOO cute!! I'm not going to lie, some of those other costumes scared me a little when I was handing out candy, so I only gave them 1 piece of candy (because I was going to have nightmares). Just because I would have loved the smurf idea (it is or original) I would have gave him my whole bag of candy left. "Butt nugget" – hahaha and I completely agree with Steph. I can't wait to have kids so I can just humiliate them when they are older.

    <3 Ash

  19. MacDougal Street Baby
    November 18, 2010 | 5:51 pm

    I love the image of a smurf amongst a posse of zombies and murderers. That kid of yours in clearly one in a million.

  20. Ameena
    November 18, 2010 | 5:56 pm

    Butt nugget…I love it! Seriously, I'll be laughing about this all day!!

  21. Eat. Live. Laugh. and sometimes shop!
    November 18, 2010 | 6:03 pm

    Butt nugget! So funny! They do seem to keep things interesting!

  22. Eat. Live. Laugh. and sometimes shop!
    November 18, 2010 | 6:03 pm

    Butt nugget! So funny! They do seem to keep things interesting!

  23. Sparkling
    November 18, 2010 | 6:04 pm

    I teach 13 year olds all day long. How on earth did you get him to let you dress him as a smurf? And then actually walk out the door that way?

  24. Courtney
    November 18, 2010 | 6:22 pm

    New to your site…
    Love the costume. So funny and original.
    I laughed quite a bit reading this

  25. Holly Ruggiero
    November 18, 2010 | 6:36 pm

    That’s absolutely adorable. It’s wonderful he let you dress him up.

  26. Gigi
    November 18, 2010 | 6:39 pm

    WOW. No way my boy would have let me do that to him – in front of friends – and get a picture. He's definitely a great sport – and a darn cute Smurf.

  27. A girl needs 2 Talk
    November 18, 2010 | 6:56 pm

    Oh my! I got a might huge laugh out of this! This smurf looks precious!!! Love the tail!

  28. CkretsGalore
    November 18, 2010 | 7:31 pm

    Yeah that so had me LOL all over the place.
    "Butt Nugget." Priceless.
    I sent my mom the link to your blog because I know it would make her cackle. If I can ever conceive I hope to be a (loving) Sadistic Mother like yourself!!

  29. That One Mom
    November 18, 2010 | 7:34 pm

    I think Smurfs will be out in full force next Halloween with the new movie coming out in the summer. How awesome that he let you dress him up that way. Love the butt nugget!

  30. Monkey Man
    November 18, 2010 | 7:39 pm

    The joy of embarrassing our children is an endless span of stink eye moments we can forever capture digitally. I just live to get the rolling eyes or the "Daa-aad". It make me so happy. Thanks for sharing your Smurf butt nugget moment with the world so the embarrassment lives on for eternity.

  31. Diane
    November 18, 2010 | 7:44 pm

    That is flippin' HILARIOUS! What a good sport he is.
    BUTT NUGGET! I am never going to forget that one!

  32. Gail
    November 18, 2010 | 7:46 pm

    The joy in the small things gets you through the day!

  33. Bouncin' Barb
    November 18, 2010 | 7:46 pm

    Your list is missing the joys of TEETHING. All the miserable, cranky, feverish, whiney, drool producing days and nights of walking the floor. My mother used to tell me to rub whiskey on his gums. Hell no. The whiskey was for me.

  34. Linda Medrano
    November 18, 2010 | 7:46 pm

    Uhm, Sandra. Why did you put a butt nugget on your little porn guy? That photo made me laugh out loud and snort. I've never seen a more miserable looking smurf. In act, I'm not sure I've ever seen a smurf before at all. One thing is for sure, you belong in Hollywood designing costumes.

  35. The Adorkable Ditz
    November 18, 2010 | 7:50 pm

    XD

    I haven't heard the term Butt nugget in a long time now.

    http://theadorkableditzmissteps.blogspot.com/

  36. Lin
    November 18, 2010 | 7:59 pm

    Do Smurfs have tails??? I didn't think they did. Anywho–that is actually a very scary costume. I'll bet his friends gave him crap for it.

  37. Julianna
    November 18, 2010 | 8:19 pm

    OMG! OMG! OMG! OMG! I laughed so hard I think I made my own butt nugget. :)

  38. Jessica
    November 18, 2010 | 8:53 pm

    I was seriously almost a smurf for halloween…he rocks that costume. Haha. Even with a butt nugget.

  39. Katy
    November 18, 2010 | 9:04 pm

    LOVE the smurf idea. Sadly my daughter never listens to me. She went as a zombie. She was the only girl zombie though.

  40. Opto-Mom
    November 18, 2010 | 9:22 pm

    That's the most awesome costume I've seen in a long time!

    Next year, wrap him with cotton batting and put a string on top of his head. Viola! He's a tampon! Ketchup optional.

  41. Just Plain Tired
    November 18, 2010 | 9:32 pm

    Gotta love moments like that!

  42. TheBabyMammaChronicles
    November 18, 2010 | 9:55 pm

    Ah Sandra, how your blog makes me smile :)

  43. Anita @ GoingALittleCoastal
    November 18, 2010 | 10:18 pm

    Omg! I don't know how you got him to let you do this to him. You must have drugged him. A little benedryl in his cereal? I bow to you girl.

  44. bluzdude
    November 18, 2010 | 10:23 pm

    Butt Nugget… I sense a new nickname in the offing.

  45. female, I shit you not!
    November 18, 2010 | 10:43 pm

    Once I enlarged this picture the image of the dog with it's tail up and it's butt up to your son's butt… cracked me up. :0)

  46. Shabbygalsnest
    November 18, 2010 | 10:48 pm

    How funny! How did you ever convince him on that one? Did you black mail him with the porn thing? LOL

  47. Mo 'Betta
    November 18, 2010 | 10:58 pm

    Love it! He looks so happy about it too ;) When I mentioned the Smurfs a while back, my kids looked at me like I was on crack..b/c you know, I'm SOOO old :P

  48. Colleen
    November 18, 2010 | 11:29 pm

    Butt nugget-priceless! Thanks for the laugh.

  49. Jana@AnAttitudeAdjustment
    November 18, 2010 | 11:47 pm

    Butt nugget is hilarious. I wonder if it tastes like chicken? :) Did Jackson know what a smurf was? They seem so long ago now–they're not still on, right?

  50. SSW
    November 19, 2010 | 1:05 am

    LOL that looked like one pissed off smurf! I find this too damn funny! My 12 year was wearing pieces of a few years costumes and what he ended up looking like was a 70's porn star! I was laughing my ass off at him and he thought he was the coolest kid on the block!

  51. momstheword
    November 19, 2010 | 1:33 am

    Ya gotta love a kid with some individuality and creativity, and blue is definitely his color!

    Also, love the nugget-tail! I had no idea Smurfs had tails either.

  52. Lin
    November 19, 2010 | 1:43 am

    lol…that's so awesome! What's even cooler is that your son actually went with it & didnt care he was sporting a "butt nugget" lol.

    Totally diggin' your site!

  53. anSeL
    November 19, 2010 | 1:46 am

    they said it all, but really it's so funny! hahaha!

  54. Myya
    November 19, 2010 | 2:30 am

    I was laughing out loud when I saw the picture of him… he looks so bummed or something. Then I cracked up at the whole butt nugget comment. Ahhh you can't make up this stuff. Seriously though I CANNOT believe he agreed to let you dress him up like a Smurf knowing all well what all his buddies were going as. Poor kid, he totally deserves a pass on the whole porn thing.

  55. caterpillar
    November 19, 2010 | 6:26 am

    ROFL….that was funny!!!

  56. Mary
    November 19, 2010 | 6:29 am

    That is a great costume! And, he does look like a smurf! Butt nugget: hilarious! :D

  57. Julie
    November 19, 2010 | 9:41 am

    bwahahahahaha!!! awesome costume, butt nugget and all.

  58. gopopgo
    November 19, 2010 | 9:52 am

    Why does Jackson look like some crazy rapper who painted himself blue? Or someone from the blue man group.

    Butt nugget? That would've definitely gotten me through the day. In fact, it may get me through today.

  59. HulaBuns
    November 19, 2010 | 10:01 am

    HAHAHAHAH! I Love the butt nugget. This is hilarious. Thank you I really needed a laugh like that today. Have a great weekend.

  60. ClosedOnSunday
    November 19, 2010 | 10:31 am

    Hahahahaha! Butt nugget. I never realized, but that's what the tails do look like.

    And he looks absolutely thrilled to be the smurf hanging out with the killer zombie & such.

    But you're right – he was probably the only smurf!

  61. Lady Fromage
    November 19, 2010 | 10:33 am

    LOL love it! I can't wait until next Halloween! No kids yet, but I'm pretty sure I could talk the hubs into wearing that ;)

    -Lady Fromage

  62. Jean Has Been Shopping
    November 19, 2010 | 10:34 am

    Love it!
    Butt nugget. You've coined a new phrase!
    Thank you for swinging by my blog. You've got a killer header yourself.

  63. Jumble Mash
    November 19, 2010 | 12:25 pm

    LMAO. That is too freakin funny! I love it!

    P.S. I gave you an award! Come see! jumblemash.blogspot.com

  64. Thisisme
    November 19, 2010 | 12:38 pm

    That post was so funny!! I love that little Smurf of yours!

  65. Hannah
    November 19, 2010 | 1:46 pm

    Oh bless him! Please shows this photo to his first girlfriend lol! x

  66. Sara @ Domestically Challenged
    November 19, 2010 | 1:51 pm

    That's right. Butt nuggets MAKE our lives!

  67. Pamela
    November 19, 2010 | 2:01 pm

    Too funny! I know this happened before the "computer incident" but it looks like pretty good payback for watching the porn!

  68. Tee aka The Diva's Thoughts
    November 19, 2010 | 3:03 pm

    OMG!! I am loving this! You have me totally cracking up! lol

  69. The Chicken's Consigliere
    November 19, 2010 | 8:24 pm

    And he let you dress him like a smerf? That's amazing. You're my hero. Well done.

  70. Garden of Egan
    November 20, 2010 | 12:47 am

    Wow, now I want a butt nugget!
    He's sorta cute all blue 'n stuff!

  71. Confessions of a Closet Hoarder but you can call me Judy
    November 20, 2010 | 1:46 am

    Oh I love the Smurf!! That is too cute and funny!

  72. Lisa
    November 20, 2010 | 2:07 am

    A butt nugget? HAHAHAHAHA!!! Favorite line today. :) And I am old enough to remember Smurfs, so I totally get you.

  73. Flying high in the sky....
    November 20, 2010 | 4:59 am

    very cute!! the whole feel of the post was cute!!!

  74. Jenn @ Youknow...that Blog?
    November 20, 2010 | 10:09 am

    Ha! I love playing with my daughters' brains, but the Teen would never let me paint her blue! Well, she might, but it wouldn't be because she wanted to smurfitize herself. Love it! I agree with one of your other commenters – save it for the wedding roast… but hide it until then so it can't be used as evidence of abuse (heehee)

    Thanks for dropping by my place – I get that you need the carbonated caffeine kick (TOTALLY get it, believe me!) and I hope you don't go through what I did as a result. I can't kick your butt because we just met, but if we meet up again, you're fair game, ok? ;) Have a good one!

  75. Vanessa
    November 20, 2010 | 1:26 pm

    <—newest follower! Only read two of your posts, but chuckled the entire time. :)

  76. K
    November 20, 2010 | 1:35 pm

    Oh, how I love this smurf tale and the photo will make me smile for weeks. I must confess I had to divert to the porn tale and enjoyed that as well, but now I have a strange smurf porn scenario popping into my sick mind. Please help.

  77. Debbie
    November 20, 2010 | 1:48 pm

    I so love this but I am also just a little jealous that I didn't think of it first.

  78. Marina at My Busy Children
    November 20, 2010 | 1:59 pm

    I love that he is so creative. I hope my kids make their own costumes when they get a little older!

  79. WhisperingWriter
    November 20, 2010 | 4:52 pm

    Haha, very cool costume.

  80. Kelly
    November 20, 2010 | 5:43 pm

    HAHA!! Love the "butt nugget"! LOL Thank you so much for the SUPER SWEET comment on my blog!! You are awesome!

    Following now :)

  81. Missy
    November 20, 2010 | 7:02 pm

    Great Idea!
    I gave my son the Smurf Lesson last year!
    I am praying for a Smurf Comeback!!

  82. Gwen
    November 22, 2010 | 3:42 pm

    OMG! I seldom laugh out loud (because it leads to children saying "What are you laughing at? I want to see!!!!), but after I saw the smurf I couldn't control myself! Perfect!

  83. Ginger
    November 22, 2010 | 10:07 pm

    muahahahahaha. Thats about the only laff that suits this. evil Mom laugh..he does look cute. I hope he got more attention from the girls than his friends…maybe not. not with the bunny tail..lol

  84. Pink Feather Paradise
    November 23, 2010 | 7:45 am

    Superb! I love the smurfs!

    x

  85. Busy Working Mama
    November 23, 2010 | 9:13 pm

    LOL – I just love you and Wayne, too :) It sure does look like a butt nugget! But without it, I wouldn't have guessed he was a smurf…maybe a cold blue man member??

  86. commonplacelife
    November 24, 2010 | 5:04 pm

    That is so sweet. Hilarious. But sweet.

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